Moods.

I've hit one of those again. Bleh. That'll teach me to stay up all night reading Red Sentience. Now I'm not exactly depressed, more...trying to find some reason I should actually go on living for? I don't know. This story was horrifying yet comforting at the same time and I still don't even know what's going through my head after finishing the entire thing around 9 this morning. And I thought the first one was the most interesting thing ever...

But yeah, I suggest nobody talk to me for a while unless they want me to talk about really weird things that might cause some people to go off the deep end. I'll be thinking about this sequel for a long while and may try to shove it down people's throats if I feel the urge. So stay back.

You see, these are the kind of things that psychologists can't cure because it's beyond their comprehension and isn't fully explored yet. And when somebody from the same subcultury fandomy bit I'm from decides to write a piece of literature full of quizzical statements the breach deep emotion and feeling, you're almost certain to have some form of side effect from the writing. Maybe it's depression. Maybe it's loneliness. Maybe it's the fact that I have just put together a large part of who I am and possibly solved but can never fix the problem which has caused me so much pain and has given me such a burden.

It's just like with my literal broken toe. Whenever I "stand-up" to what the world has to offer, I am always able to stand up straight if I give in a good effort. However, no matter how hard I try, somebody will notice a slight limp or a slower walking pace and my pain will always show through. There will always be those moments where I just have to sit down and cringe as the pain works it's course, or moments where I act a little more reserved to protect the spot where I am in pain from collecting any more pain.

...I'm gonna go do something else now...