I apologize for the random title, but I just stayed up all night being productive for once and I feel deliriously happy as shit. I have had a full cup of coffee and like a half of a row of Chips Ahoy! cookies, caffeine and sugar ftw. I got half my Science project thing done along with the test review for my units 3-6 Geography test I have still not taken and I finished the script (and attempted a recording) for the Battle of the Atlantic radio broadcast for History class. Apparently I'm more productive when my mouth is busy with stuff. Silly oral fixation. Never did get to play any Dead Space though...I never have time for new games anymore. x.x
My Mom got a new Tassimo coffee maker to replace our dying Keurig thing. It is much better than the Keurig, especially since the coffee doesn't taste like shit, the tea is the best I've ever tasted, and the cappuccinos...fuck am I ever addicted to those!
Let's see...this weekend I did a lot of gifting, mostly on Steam. I also bought my first commission (a $5 badge of my new kitty 'sona) and I bought myself Pikmin 1 and a GameCube controller so I actually have something to do on my Wii. Still pissed off at myself for trading away my own Pikmin games to a friend for Guitar Hero 1, especially since I haven't got a PS2 with me at the moment and therefore can't use the guitar controller. But that was like a year or two ago, back when I thought I'd never have a means for playing them any time in the future. And lastly, I did buy myself a couple games offa Steam; Dead Space and Dead Space 2. The original plan was to play Dead Space all night, but homework took over my conscience. :P
Anyway, I am thinking of saving up any extra money I get to go towards computer parts once I get a better job. First a case, then the motherboard, then either the RAM or the graphics card. The power supply in my current PC is brand new and the HDD is a whole terabyte, so they should be fine to keep. I dislike my case a lot even though it has a lot of ports 'n' shit, but the CD drives I have should do me over until I can afford a Blu-ray drive, if I still feel like getting one by then. That is a shitload of money that I won't have for a very long time, but it will be so worth it when I finally put it all together.
Yuppers, there's a short blog fer ya. Gonna be drinking coffee all day and falling asleep in class, woo~
11.28.2011
11.17.2011
THIS IS THE POST THAT NEVEEEEER EEEEENDS~
I've not written in a couple forevers, whoops. I'll try and fit a whole bunch of things into this next blog to play a bit of catch-up...and so that Kelsey will stop complaining about my lack of activity. *glares*
ANYWAY. The premise of this blog post is to push out as many of the things on my mind in one go as I can possibly wrack my brain for, while also giving you a more organized setup so you can skip over anything you don;t want to hear about. It should be fairly obvious as to how this will work by the blatantly apparent addition of subtitles. If for whatever reason you can't figure out how to tell the sections apart, I can almost guarantee that the best solution I can offer you to get rid of that problem would be waiting for you at the bottom of a large cliff.
LET THE GAMES BEGIN. (and may they be ever in your favour)
Europe Trip!
Earlier this evening I went to an information session regarding the school's Europe Trip taking place in March 2013. It'll be covering France and Italy (specifically Paris, Florence, and Rome) and although it'll be the most expensive thing to ever happen to me, I will hopefully be going! It sounds like the thrill of a lifetime, and although I fail at showing outward emotion, the mere thought of the trip is enough to get me gaping in awe. Somehow I am going to need to fundraise at least $4000 (not including spending money) just to be able to go on the trip! In all fairness, that includes transportation, insurance, dinners and lunches, accommodations, and all the other necessary things, so it's not all bad but still ridiculously expensive for a high school student. But the cost means nothing to me as long as I can have a good time.
Europe Backpacking!
My Mom out-of-the-blue said that if I wanted to go backpacking through Europe for a year after high school, she would be willing to pay air fare. This is exciting news! Instead of worrying about getting on my feet and figuring out where I'll fit into society's stupid workforce, I get to unwind and explore Europe! So cool. I've not yet decided on whether I'd like to lone it or find an accomplice or two, but one thing's for certain. This will be a part of my plans for after high school! Now I actually have exciting purpose behind trudging through the wretched excuse for an education system the school boards have put in place and the government requires me to put-up with.
Fursona
I've finally got a design in mind for my new cat 'sona that also led to the discovery of an excellent string of ideas to get me started writing a piece of fiction. Playing on the fact that Scott has dubbed me perpetually ablaze thanks to the orangish colour of my hair, my 'sona can combust at will. Well, more like it has a large extent of control over the temperature of it's body. His normal fur colour is a sooty black (his fur is a very deep black everywhere, but he is also covered in soot after changing back from his fiery form), in his hot form he has orange fur with red stripes (or in his full-on fiery form he is pretty much fire in the shape of a cat), and in his cold form he has light blue fur with navy blue stripes (or in his full frozen-state mode he is basically made of pure ice). All that confusing form stuff relates to his feral form, but when anthropomorphic he is essentially just a black cat with white inner ears and paw pads and vivid green eyes (eye colour yet to be determined for feral form...god this is confusing. :P). His primary name is Aaron. It'd probably be a lot easier to see a ref sheet considering all the specific details pertaining to every form, but that'll have to wait until I make a good enough income.
Moving and Christmas Vacation to Cuba
Moving to the city on the 15th of December. I'll miss a week of school thanks to that and the vacation to Cuba. We'll be staying there until a couple days after Christmas and I'll have to leave all electronics save for anything I wouldn't mind not coming home with at the new house. So if anyone needs to get a hold of me regarding something to do with Christmas, do it the weekend before I leave (Dec. 16-18) otherwise you'll have to wait until after I get back to reach me.
Wii
Getting one tomorrow (more accurately today, or for simplicity's sake, Thursday November 17th). Won't have any games for it right away unless I steal a couple off my friends who all seem to have Wiis for some reason. I'll splash my Wii Code onto Twitter as well as here on the blog along with a repost of my various other gaming IDs, in case anybody wants to add me on anything.
CONCLUSION
...That seems to be all for tonight. I will post more in the morning, but I really need some sleep and since I have to wake-up at 5:45am and have loads of plans later today, going to bed at 2am is a big deal for me. So with that I guess I leave you to continue looking at space porn or whatever the fuck you kids do on the internet nowadays.
ANYWAY. The premise of this blog post is to push out as many of the things on my mind in one go as I can possibly wrack my brain for, while also giving you a more organized setup so you can skip over anything you don;t want to hear about. It should be fairly obvious as to how this will work by the blatantly apparent addition of subtitles. If for whatever reason you can't figure out how to tell the sections apart, I can almost guarantee that the best solution I can offer you to get rid of that problem would be waiting for you at the bottom of a large cliff.
LET THE GAMES BEGIN. (and may they be ever in your favour)
Europe Trip!
Earlier this evening I went to an information session regarding the school's Europe Trip taking place in March 2013. It'll be covering France and Italy (specifically Paris, Florence, and Rome) and although it'll be the most expensive thing to ever happen to me, I will hopefully be going! It sounds like the thrill of a lifetime, and although I fail at showing outward emotion, the mere thought of the trip is enough to get me gaping in awe. Somehow I am going to need to fundraise at least $4000 (not including spending money) just to be able to go on the trip! In all fairness, that includes transportation, insurance, dinners and lunches, accommodations, and all the other necessary things, so it's not all bad but still ridiculously expensive for a high school student. But the cost means nothing to me as long as I can have a good time.
Europe Backpacking!
My Mom out-of-the-blue said that if I wanted to go backpacking through Europe for a year after high school, she would be willing to pay air fare. This is exciting news! Instead of worrying about getting on my feet and figuring out where I'll fit into society's stupid workforce, I get to unwind and explore Europe! So cool. I've not yet decided on whether I'd like to lone it or find an accomplice or two, but one thing's for certain. This will be a part of my plans for after high school! Now I actually have exciting purpose behind trudging through the wretched excuse for an education system the school boards have put in place and the government requires me to put-up with.
Fursona
I've finally got a design in mind for my new cat 'sona that also led to the discovery of an excellent string of ideas to get me started writing a piece of fiction. Playing on the fact that Scott has dubbed me perpetually ablaze thanks to the orangish colour of my hair, my 'sona can combust at will. Well, more like it has a large extent of control over the temperature of it's body. His normal fur colour is a sooty black (his fur is a very deep black everywhere, but he is also covered in soot after changing back from his fiery form), in his hot form he has orange fur with red stripes (or in his full-on fiery form he is pretty much fire in the shape of a cat), and in his cold form he has light blue fur with navy blue stripes (or in his full frozen-state mode he is basically made of pure ice). All that confusing form stuff relates to his feral form, but when anthropomorphic he is essentially just a black cat with white inner ears and paw pads and vivid green eyes (eye colour yet to be determined for feral form...god this is confusing. :P). His primary name is Aaron. It'd probably be a lot easier to see a ref sheet considering all the specific details pertaining to every form, but that'll have to wait until I make a good enough income.
Moving and Christmas Vacation to Cuba
Moving to the city on the 15th of December. I'll miss a week of school thanks to that and the vacation to Cuba. We'll be staying there until a couple days after Christmas and I'll have to leave all electronics save for anything I wouldn't mind not coming home with at the new house. So if anyone needs to get a hold of me regarding something to do with Christmas, do it the weekend before I leave (Dec. 16-18) otherwise you'll have to wait until after I get back to reach me.
Wii
Getting one tomorrow (more accurately today, or for simplicity's sake, Thursday November 17th). Won't have any games for it right away unless I steal a couple off my friends who all seem to have Wiis for some reason. I'll splash my Wii Code onto Twitter as well as here on the blog along with a repost of my various other gaming IDs, in case anybody wants to add me on anything.
CONCLUSION
...That seems to be all for tonight. I will post more in the morning, but I really need some sleep and since I have to wake-up at 5:45am and have loads of plans later today, going to bed at 2am is a big deal for me. So with that I guess I leave you to continue looking at space porn or whatever the fuck you kids do on the internet nowadays.
11.02.2011
And then productivity soared through the roof.
I stayed up the entire night Monday. Got a ton of work done when I had the adrenaline rush from being awake so long, then spent the rest of the time researching and planning because I couldn't write because confusion and too many events to work into the journal and bleh. Thing is, I wrote about 3 pages (almost 2000 words) so ...yeah, for a whole night that's pathetic but still a lot of progress on the assignment itself.
And then last night I slept from after school to dinner and then from dinner to my usual morning wake-up time. And I still feel like I could use a few more hours of more sleep. My productivity just crashed as bad as the stock market I was researching the other night. Oh well. I can finish this thing tonight or whenever.
Moral of the story? Historical roleplay journals are stupid.
And then last night I slept from after school to dinner and then from dinner to my usual morning wake-up time. And I still feel like I could use a few more hours of more sleep. My productivity just crashed as bad as the stock market I was researching the other night. Oh well. I can finish this thing tonight or whenever.
Moral of the story? Historical roleplay journals are stupid.
10.27.2011
Productivity is as low as ever.
I cannot get a thing done. My laptop will be gone until next weekend at the earliest, and I have no clue when I'll get the monitor to fix it. Plus I can't work with my brother sitting 6 inches away from me stinking up my office (he smells soooo bad x.x) and by the time he's gone to bed, I'm too tired and it's way too late to be working.
Now, I don't usually pimp sites that are destined to fail, but a friend of mine made a Facebook clone revolving around Doctor Who. Last I checked, we had a total of 15 members. It just opened up earlier this week, so if you sign up now you won't be too out of the loop. If you're interested, head over now why don't you.
And last but not least, a couple webcomic strips from the past couple days you might find interesting: 1 2
Now, I don't usually pimp sites that are destined to fail, but a friend of mine made a Facebook clone revolving around Doctor Who. Last I checked, we had a total of 15 members. It just opened up earlier this week, so if you sign up now you won't be too out of the loop. If you're interested, head over now why don't you.
And last but not least, a couple webcomic strips from the past couple days you might find interesting: 1 2
10.24.2011
I keep forgetting about posting here. -_-
So, to start the morning off, there were some amazing strips today from some of the least amazing webcomics in the 27 I read. The one that caught my attention the most though was in fact from a more mainstream comic, and of course that would be xkcd. This strip fits me perfectly, and probably a lot of other people I know. The happiness of anyone I like in any way is not at all important compared to my own life. In fact, there's a significant gap between how important my own life is versus how important somebody else's happiness is.
And that thing I was gonna post here last week, which the last blog post referenced, was just a simple little heads-up and maybe a bit of a clue to those who are still guessing. If Hayden is anything of a good example, I'm sure pretty much anyone who's curious as to what exactly I am into has listed off numerous kinks in the hopes that I would be into one of them. Unfortunately for people like Hayden, the fetish is probably to obscure to pick-up on. But I will say a few things about stuff here.
I can get into anything, sexually, even if it isn't one of my own kinks and as long as it isn't a blatant turn off. My own kinks still take a large priority over everything else, but for some reason my "gifted" mind has developed a way to understand pretty much every kink's appeal. Though like I keep saying, it doesn't work on everything. Blatant turn-offs (scat, gore, fat, etc.) as well as inflation and probably a few other kinks I haven't yet tested just don't work in part that they tip the scale and I never seem to get anywhere.
So yeah, that's pretty much all I have to say on the matter.
Well, I have to go to school now, so bye I guess.
And that thing I was gonna post here last week, which the last blog post referenced, was just a simple little heads-up and maybe a bit of a clue to those who are still guessing. If Hayden is anything of a good example, I'm sure pretty much anyone who's curious as to what exactly I am into has listed off numerous kinks in the hopes that I would be into one of them. Unfortunately for people like Hayden, the fetish is probably to obscure to pick-up on. But I will say a few things about stuff here.
I can get into anything, sexually, even if it isn't one of my own kinks and as long as it isn't a blatant turn off. My own kinks still take a large priority over everything else, but for some reason my "gifted" mind has developed a way to understand pretty much every kink's appeal. Though like I keep saying, it doesn't work on everything. Blatant turn-offs (scat, gore, fat, etc.) as well as inflation and probably a few other kinks I haven't yet tested just don't work in part that they tip the scale and I never seem to get anywhere.
So yeah, that's pretty much all I have to say on the matter.
Well, I have to go to school now, so bye I guess.
10.20.2011
Tired~
Yeah, I'm a bit dead from staying up 'til about 1am because of flyers and homework. All in all it wasn't that bad of a night, though. Regardless, other than maybe a small paragraph, I don't think this will be an overly regular blog post. You'll see soon enough why. :P
So the other day I got my paycheck. It was only $53.20, which was a major disappointment, since I thought it would be at least $60. Oh well. Still money. So I bought a couple of things with my PayPal thinking they'd overdraft into my bank account like last time and I could pay them off Friday when my Mom cashes the check, right? Nopenope. A little less than $15 worth of charges were charged to my Mom's credit card, and without first coming home and asking about the mysterious charges, she cancelled her charge card and had the charges reversed. So I'm hoping PayPal does it right this time and charges my bank account, otherwise I'm gonna receive many a complaint about having no money to fund my PayPal account. Not a lot of money but still worrying.
Anyway, I think I'm going to inject some more personal stuff into this blog post later. Like, on the bus via my smartphone or something. It's not too interesting, just more personal than usual, and I kinda have stuff to do right now.
Chow for now!
So the other day I got my paycheck. It was only $53.20, which was a major disappointment, since I thought it would be at least $60. Oh well. Still money. So I bought a couple of things with my PayPal thinking they'd overdraft into my bank account like last time and I could pay them off Friday when my Mom cashes the check, right? Nopenope. A little less than $15 worth of charges were charged to my Mom's credit card, and without first coming home and asking about the mysterious charges, she cancelled her charge card and had the charges reversed. So I'm hoping PayPal does it right this time and charges my bank account, otherwise I'm gonna receive many a complaint about having no money to fund my PayPal account. Not a lot of money but still worrying.
Anyway, I think I'm going to inject some more personal stuff into this blog post later. Like, on the bus via my smartphone or something. It's not too interesting, just more personal than usual, and I kinda have stuff to do right now.
Chow for now!
10.05.2011
Apples.
Apple blog post number one won't be coming until tomorrow since I'm tired (the one regarding apple slices and sugar triggering memories and stuff). However, I do have something else regarding apples. Or, more accurately, the one and only Apple.
Steve Jobs lost his fight to Cancer today and it astonished me greatly. I was kind of curious why Jobs didn't show up at the keynote, but I forgot all about his Cancer until Morgan texted me while I was packing flyers and notified me of his death by simply saying "Steve Jobs is dead." Upon glimpsing my Twitter feed, the news was confirmed.
Now, I'm not an Apple fanboy (used to be...) but I do have to say, Android OS and Windows would not be as far ahead as they are today if they did not have to compete and keep-up with Apple's iOS and OSX, respectively. It is a big loss for Apple and for the whole of the tech crowd to lose such an innovative man. May he rest in peace.
Moving right on, I watched CSI tonight and I have to say, nothing has gotten me on edge like that before. They had proper terminology - the rapist was called a predator, a murderer, and of course a rapist, but never did they blame anything on paedophilia - and the guy with the chocolate fetish...well...that was kind of humorous but also handled extremely well. For a show like CSI that is fairly mainstream and has given bad light to fetishes and sexualities in the past, it was a very good episode. I think I may begin watching it regularly...if I don't get nightmares from seeing a girl's maggot-ridden skull encased in concrete. The plot was fairly predictable but all the while exciting, and it included a wide variety of more mature topics that I love being exposed to. Shows that go in-depth about nasty things are like a guilty pleasure...the more I see, the more I know, and the more I get desensitized from.
And now it's 45 minutes past my bedtime. Swell. I think I'll end this here for now. 'til we meet again...farewell.
Steve Jobs lost his fight to Cancer today and it astonished me greatly. I was kind of curious why Jobs didn't show up at the keynote, but I forgot all about his Cancer until Morgan texted me while I was packing flyers and notified me of his death by simply saying "Steve Jobs is dead." Upon glimpsing my Twitter feed, the news was confirmed.
Now, I'm not an Apple fanboy (used to be...) but I do have to say, Android OS and Windows would not be as far ahead as they are today if they did not have to compete and keep-up with Apple's iOS and OSX, respectively. It is a big loss for Apple and for the whole of the tech crowd to lose such an innovative man. May he rest in peace.
Moving right on, I watched CSI tonight and I have to say, nothing has gotten me on edge like that before. They had proper terminology - the rapist was called a predator, a murderer, and of course a rapist, but never did they blame anything on paedophilia - and the guy with the chocolate fetish...well...that was kind of humorous but also handled extremely well. For a show like CSI that is fairly mainstream and has given bad light to fetishes and sexualities in the past, it was a very good episode. I think I may begin watching it regularly...if I don't get nightmares from seeing a girl's maggot-ridden skull encased in concrete. The plot was fairly predictable but all the while exciting, and it included a wide variety of more mature topics that I love being exposed to. Shows that go in-depth about nasty things are like a guilty pleasure...the more I see, the more I know, and the more I get desensitized from.
And now it's 45 minutes past my bedtime. Swell. I think I'll end this here for now. 'til we meet again...farewell.
10.04.2011
Still Alive.
Not the song. God, do I ever hate that song now...I'm talking about Fish. Fish is still alive and kicking. He looks fairly healthy. He might even last more than a week by the looks of it.
I've been attempting homework for the past little bit and have been totally failing at trying to get three separate sets of data to appear on the same scatter plot in Microsoft Office Word 2010. Having no luck after a half hour or so of trying, I ditched it and hope to move on to something productive after blogging. But I have noticed one thing: my iTunes library lacks a good homework playlist. I have barely any good upbeat songs that help me "play the game" and do my homework like a good little conformist. Everything is either sad or depressing (or some form of techno/trance shit from Newgrounds) and it all induces high levels of what society would call "negative" or "pessimistic" thinking. It's uber duber annoying...I need a taste in happy music pronto.
Speaking of taste in music. I suggest you check out these five songs I really like by Yellowcard. Lights and Sounds, the first of their songs I came to like, is in Burnout Legends for PSP. It was a great game and the soundtrack was where I picked up on Billy Talent through their song Red Flag. I would go into the soundtrack menu just to hover over each song and listen to them each on repeat for hours on end. The next, Way Away, is a song that I have actually been listening to since grade 4, 3 years before I discovered Burnout Legends, via a burned YTV Big Fun Party Mix 6 CD. I had the CD ripped onto my shitty MP3 player and everything, but I never even knew the name of the band that played the song until recently. This CD is where I picked up on Simple Plan (I'm Just A Kid), Blink-182 (I Miss You), and a couple other bands that aren't as iconic to me. Next up were I think Breathing and Ocean Avenue. Ocean Avenue's album cover was everywhere, including in the Rock Band music store, so I decided to investigate on iTunes. Seconds after previewing it I made the purchase. Breathing popped up somewhere on YouTube I think...maybe more recently. I never actually noticed until I played the game again only a few months ago, but I also noticed it in Burnout 3 Takedown (see why Yellowcard is so special to me? So many favourite games...). The Takedown, the fifth song I know and definitely my favourite, actually appeared on Guitar Hero: Van Halen, shortly after I discovered that I liked the band Yellowcard and knew them from many different places in my timeline.
So yeah. They're a good band. Go click through to some of those linked songs if you've got a moment.
Back to homework now! Just thought I'd spam the blog with another large post since I had such a long unannounced hiatus. Seeya around!
I've been attempting homework for the past little bit and have been totally failing at trying to get three separate sets of data to appear on the same scatter plot in Microsoft Office Word 2010. Having no luck after a half hour or so of trying, I ditched it and hope to move on to something productive after blogging. But I have noticed one thing: my iTunes library lacks a good homework playlist. I have barely any good upbeat songs that help me "play the game" and do my homework like a good little conformist. Everything is either sad or depressing (or some form of techno/trance shit from Newgrounds) and it all induces high levels of what society would call "negative" or "pessimistic" thinking. It's uber duber annoying...I need a taste in happy music pronto.
Speaking of taste in music. I suggest you check out these five songs I really like by Yellowcard. Lights and Sounds, the first of their songs I came to like, is in Burnout Legends for PSP. It was a great game and the soundtrack was where I picked up on Billy Talent through their song Red Flag. I would go into the soundtrack menu just to hover over each song and listen to them each on repeat for hours on end. The next, Way Away, is a song that I have actually been listening to since grade 4, 3 years before I discovered Burnout Legends, via a burned YTV Big Fun Party Mix 6 CD. I had the CD ripped onto my shitty MP3 player and everything, but I never even knew the name of the band that played the song until recently. This CD is where I picked up on Simple Plan (I'm Just A Kid), Blink-182 (I Miss You), and a couple other bands that aren't as iconic to me. Next up were I think Breathing and Ocean Avenue. Ocean Avenue's album cover was everywhere, including in the Rock Band music store, so I decided to investigate on iTunes. Seconds after previewing it I made the purchase. Breathing popped up somewhere on YouTube I think...maybe more recently. I never actually noticed until I played the game again only a few months ago, but I also noticed it in Burnout 3 Takedown (see why Yellowcard is so special to me? So many favourite games...). The Takedown, the fifth song I know and definitely my favourite, actually appeared on Guitar Hero: Van Halen, shortly after I discovered that I liked the band Yellowcard and knew them from many different places in my timeline.
So yeah. They're a good band. Go click through to some of those linked songs if you've got a moment.
Back to homework now! Just thought I'd spam the blog with another large post since I had such a long unannounced hiatus. Seeya around!
10.03.2011
FISH.
In case you didn't already know, I went to the Caledonia Fair on Saturday and won a goldfish. Since I'm so original, I named it "Fish". It probably won't last through the week, but it's cool to have a fish all the same.
Previous to that, I went to a Magic: The Gathering draft. Got a handful of interesting cards but overall sucked dick. The only win I got that night was because my would-be third opponent had to leave, so I got a free win. Woo. Still fun though. Especially the game against Scott. Honestly, that was one of the funnest card games I've ever played. I'd definitely go again if I had the chance.
Anyway, enough of that. I seem to be getting a handle on school finally. I've discovered (thanks to Morgan) that I probably suffer from Analysis Paralysis (check out Wikipedia, that's an actual thing, and it's not too great within today's society). I've got myself doing things the funnest way possible for me and I'm only doing work when I feel up to doing so, and so far it's not taking a toll on me. Sure I'm a bit behind now, but once the new routine fits in with my sleep routine and such it will make things much easier and I'll breeze right on through.
So this just means I might get back on the social train. Or not. I'm getting kinda sick of talking to people over the internet. It's just a big game of saying the right things, and you can't hear tone or see a person's reactions or share a drink with someone or even play a game with them. It's all just a screen full of emotion-dullened text. But alas, that screen of text is about as close as I can get to some people outside of school. And others refuse to arrange to get together. So if I wanna keep up good terms with some people, I gotta pretend to enjoy internet social activity. Though I do actually like Twitter. Whatever happened to emails and handwritten letters? Those were so cool back in the day. Now we're just set into a routine of throwing meaningless short sentences back and forth every night and occasionally getting information out of one another. Blogging is like an online journal for everyone to read, and Twitter is micro-blogging. It's good to get your thoughts on paper...or on a screen at least. It's not as good to exchange meaningless blubber.And it's even worse to have people not respond to your meaningless blubber.
In fear of making this another of those ranty longish blogs that I seem to produce quite often, I think I'll cut it here. Since Morgan and I just had a fairly large and interesting conversation, I think I'll spend the rest of the night reading Inkheart and maybe playing the Battlefield 3 Beta on my PS3 (which is really great by the way). Books beat games any day, but Inkheart isn't too great so far. Nearly done the first chapter...yay...
Finally done this thing. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'll be off.
Previous to that, I went to a Magic: The Gathering draft. Got a handful of interesting cards but overall sucked dick. The only win I got that night was because my would-be third opponent had to leave, so I got a free win. Woo. Still fun though. Especially the game against Scott. Honestly, that was one of the funnest card games I've ever played. I'd definitely go again if I had the chance.
Anyway, enough of that. I seem to be getting a handle on school finally. I've discovered (thanks to Morgan) that I probably suffer from Analysis Paralysis (check out Wikipedia, that's an actual thing, and it's not too great within today's society). I've got myself doing things the funnest way possible for me and I'm only doing work when I feel up to doing so, and so far it's not taking a toll on me. Sure I'm a bit behind now, but once the new routine fits in with my sleep routine and such it will make things much easier and I'll breeze right on through.
So this just means I might get back on the social train. Or not. I'm getting kinda sick of talking to people over the internet. It's just a big game of saying the right things, and you can't hear tone or see a person's reactions or share a drink with someone or even play a game with them. It's all just a screen full of emotion-dullened text. But alas, that screen of text is about as close as I can get to some people outside of school. And others refuse to arrange to get together. So if I wanna keep up good terms with some people, I gotta pretend to enjoy internet social activity. Though I do actually like Twitter. Whatever happened to emails and handwritten letters? Those were so cool back in the day. Now we're just set into a routine of throwing meaningless short sentences back and forth every night and occasionally getting information out of one another. Blogging is like an online journal for everyone to read, and Twitter is micro-blogging. It's good to get your thoughts on paper...or on a screen at least. It's not as good to exchange meaningless blubber.And it's even worse to have people not respond to your meaningless blubber.
In fear of making this another of those ranty longish blogs that I seem to produce quite often, I think I'll cut it here. Since Morgan and I just had a fairly large and interesting conversation, I think I'll spend the rest of the night reading Inkheart and maybe playing the Battlefield 3 Beta on my PS3 (which is really great by the way). Books beat games any day, but Inkheart isn't too great so far. Nearly done the first chapter...yay...
Finally done this thing. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'll be off.
9.24.2011
Schedules were meant to be broken!
This is just gonna be a quick blurb just before I go to be. There is not gonna be a schedule for blogging for a while. Usually I blog whenever I feel like doing so and that just so happened to line up perfectly with the schedule I said I would stick to. Well, guess what: my new sleep schedule put in place for my insomnia is making me feel really whack, along with school. SO. Until things settle, blog posts can be expected to be few and far between. Unless by some miracle I actually get around to doing it more often now that I've mentioned my inactivity...just because life likes to fuck me up like that.
Quick recap of recent events: went to the mall with Morgan, Steven, and Hayden. Bought Burnout 3 Takedown for $5.99 (for PS2 this time because Sony is best!) and Ratchet & Clank: Up Your Arsenal for $1.99 (again, for PS2, obviously). Went over to Hayden's afterwards, played over 6 hours of CoD Zombies (sooooo boooooooring), ate a ton of food, and slept over. Got back home today and went shopping with the mother, ate dinner, dicked around for a couple hours, then settled in for Doctor Who.
House showing tomorrow. x.x Won't be online much other than really early and really late (if at all).
Getting up at 5:45am! Better sleep now. See all yous!
Quick recap of recent events: went to the mall with Morgan, Steven, and Hayden. Bought Burnout 3 Takedown for $5.99 (for PS2 this time because Sony is best!) and Ratchet & Clank: Up Your Arsenal for $1.99 (again, for PS2, obviously). Went over to Hayden's afterwards, played over 6 hours of CoD Zombies (sooooo boooooooring), ate a ton of food, and slept over. Got back home today and went shopping with the mother, ate dinner, dicked around for a couple hours, then settled in for Doctor Who.
House showing tomorrow. x.x Won't be online much other than really early and really late (if at all).
Getting up at 5:45am! Better sleep now. See all yous!
9.17.2011
Fuuuuuuck.
So social networks are getting a little hectic...I cannot keep up with all of the things at once. That is complicated shit.
Before you read any further, open up this, this, this, this, or this for listening to over the duration of the post.
In case you haven't heard me obsess about it, Burnout 3: Takedown has to be one of my favouritist games. It has the absolute best soundtrack (like 44 songs long), involves lots of smashing and explosions, and has an unrealistic yet extremely entertaining take on the physics of driving a car. It has to be the best racing game I have ever played, and it's what...7+ years old? I've only had it for like 5 years, but it was released way before then. It's also the first place I ever heard some of my favourite bands and never realized it. It's how I suddenly got obsessed with Paper Wings by Rise Against about a month back. Yeah, all that plus the fact that it was my first Xbox game ever and I still own it, this game has a lot of history for me. Just like how Spyro was the first PlayStation game I ever played and has followed me around ever since.
SO. Now I've cashed my first paycheck (woo) and I've payed my brother back his $20 plus the $5 I owed him for helping with fliers during the huge overhaul week where I did three routes. All I've got leftover is a $20 bill in my wallet and an entire $19.24 in the bank account I set up today. This Scotiabank card is so sexy...I wanna use it right away! But I should really think hard about what I want before I buy anything since my paycheck sucks all the dicks...man I need a better job. Anyway, I still can't decide between old PS2 games such as GTA:SA and Vice City, padding, Magic: The Gathering cards, or if I should just slowly use it up for food purposes and busing and shit like that. SUCH TOUGH DECISIONS.
I just thought I'd mention...tried Little Caesars pizza tonight. It tasted a lot better than Gino's Pizza...and I nearly CHOKED on the first bite due to the starchy taste! I'm convinced that Gino's is just glorified cardboard. :P
I think I should go to bed now. Just wanted to post something since I haven't been active for a few days. And I might not post a while longer because I hope to load up my entire weekend with social interaction (maybe it'd help if I actually turned on my chat clients...but people are annoying when Minecraft...). Though I did have a huge discussion about pedophilia with someone on Twitter (who has a small chunk of fame) which was kinda fun.
I'm going to bed after Paper Wings and Tears Into Wine!
'Night guys!
Before you read any further, open up this, this, this, this, or this for listening to over the duration of the post.
In case you haven't heard me obsess about it, Burnout 3: Takedown has to be one of my favouritist games. It has the absolute best soundtrack (like 44 songs long), involves lots of smashing and explosions, and has an unrealistic yet extremely entertaining take on the physics of driving a car. It has to be the best racing game I have ever played, and it's what...7+ years old? I've only had it for like 5 years, but it was released way before then. It's also the first place I ever heard some of my favourite bands and never realized it. It's how I suddenly got obsessed with Paper Wings by Rise Against about a month back. Yeah, all that plus the fact that it was my first Xbox game ever and I still own it, this game has a lot of history for me. Just like how Spyro was the first PlayStation game I ever played and has followed me around ever since.
SO. Now I've cashed my first paycheck (woo) and I've payed my brother back his $20 plus the $5 I owed him for helping with fliers during the huge overhaul week where I did three routes. All I've got leftover is a $20 bill in my wallet and an entire $19.24 in the bank account I set up today. This Scotiabank card is so sexy...I wanna use it right away! But I should really think hard about what I want before I buy anything since my paycheck sucks all the dicks...man I need a better job. Anyway, I still can't decide between old PS2 games such as GTA:SA and Vice City, padding, Magic: The Gathering cards, or if I should just slowly use it up for food purposes and busing and shit like that. SUCH TOUGH DECISIONS.
I just thought I'd mention...tried Little Caesars pizza tonight. It tasted a lot better than Gino's Pizza...and I nearly CHOKED on the first bite due to the starchy taste! I'm convinced that Gino's is just glorified cardboard. :P
I think I should go to bed now. Just wanted to post something since I haven't been active for a few days. And I might not post a while longer because I hope to load up my entire weekend with social interaction (maybe it'd help if I actually turned on my chat clients...but people are annoying when Minecraft...). Though I did have a huge discussion about pedophilia with someone on Twitter (who has a small chunk of fame) which was kinda fun.
I'm going to bed after Paper Wings and Tears Into Wine!
'Night guys!
9.13.2011
Hm.
Somebody needs to yell at me every time I don't update this, because seriously I got 25 views on Sunday which is insane. Maybe some people thought I was gonna bitch about 9/11, which would be hypocritical because I hate when other people bring it up. But I haven't done a blog post for a couple days, so it must have been a disappointment.
Anywho. I may ponder everything in my head for hours on end when I have trouble sleeping or am riding in a car for a long boring stretch, but I have never thought about the realities of war as intensely as my grade 10 History class is getting me to visualize. I'm surprised I haven't had nightmares about it all yet...hell, I'll probably have one tonight since I've been thinking about WWI like all day. I never want to go to war. There is no glory in it, and there is no reason on the planet important enough to get me to stick a gun in an innocent man's face and pull the trigger.
My teacher is really good at his job. I have to say History is my favourite subject so far this semester.
So lately I've been playing a lot of the Minecraft 1.8 Pre-Release. Being a huge Minecraft addict, I've probably put in about a total of 5 or 6 hours - maybe even more - in just the past two nights. It is the most amazing thing, adding things to survival that actually make it a true survival mode (requiring you to keep up a food meter, making certain things poisonous, etc.). I think it has been the most fun I have had paying a game in months, and I've played Fallout: New Vegas and Grand Theft Auto IV and LittleBigPlanet recently. I highly recommend the pre-release to everyone who has a Minecraft account.
Speaking of pre-releases, I am gonna try Windows 8 on both my computers once Scott gets two disks to me to burn the images to. Really anticipating this...if they learned anything from Vista to 7, it's that people want a lightweight, user-friendly OS that doesn't have tons of features that barely anyone can actually find a use for. So hopefully it'll run really well on my shittop (my school/work laptop) and allow me to do things like Minecraft on it.
Side note: I've been really digging old-style FPS games and dungeon crawlers. I need to get back to playign Half-Life 1 now that it's installed on the shittop.
And I've been addicted to eating raw spaghetti for the past month or so. Not surprising considering the strength of my oral fixation. I rarely ever chew things, so the crunchiness of the dry spaghetti helps exercise my jaw to a point where I'm equally content with going back to regular oral activities. I need something to chew on...not sure where I'll find anything though.
To sum up, classes have been pretty good, friends are pretty much the same as usual (not very enthusiastic about going out of their way to do social stuff), home life is pretty relaxing and entertaining (though not nearly enough as I'd like...vidya gaems are BORING), and I have like two crushes on people at school which I shall never reveal unless I feel like revealing them. Well, one is definitely a crush, but the other is less of a crush and more of a "I like this person but I'm iffy if I'd actually want to start anything with them ever". A thing I know for sure though is that neither of them are going to see any progress any time soon, and I can probably find much better matches if I look two feet farther. Online dating doesn't seem like something I'd want to start up again until I get more of a hold on school and a social life so...yeah, I guess I'll just stick it out for a while.
Welp, I'm tired and I need sleepy times! SO...bedtime!
'Night peeps.
Anywho. I may ponder everything in my head for hours on end when I have trouble sleeping or am riding in a car for a long boring stretch, but I have never thought about the realities of war as intensely as my grade 10 History class is getting me to visualize. I'm surprised I haven't had nightmares about it all yet...hell, I'll probably have one tonight since I've been thinking about WWI like all day. I never want to go to war. There is no glory in it, and there is no reason on the planet important enough to get me to stick a gun in an innocent man's face and pull the trigger.
My teacher is really good at his job. I have to say History is my favourite subject so far this semester.
So lately I've been playing a lot of the Minecraft 1.8 Pre-Release. Being a huge Minecraft addict, I've probably put in about a total of 5 or 6 hours - maybe even more - in just the past two nights. It is the most amazing thing, adding things to survival that actually make it a true survival mode (requiring you to keep up a food meter, making certain things poisonous, etc.). I think it has been the most fun I have had paying a game in months, and I've played Fallout: New Vegas and Grand Theft Auto IV and LittleBigPlanet recently. I highly recommend the pre-release to everyone who has a Minecraft account.
Speaking of pre-releases, I am gonna try Windows 8 on both my computers once Scott gets two disks to me to burn the images to. Really anticipating this...if they learned anything from Vista to 7, it's that people want a lightweight, user-friendly OS that doesn't have tons of features that barely anyone can actually find a use for. So hopefully it'll run really well on my shittop (my school/work laptop) and allow me to do things like Minecraft on it.
Side note: I've been really digging old-style FPS games and dungeon crawlers. I need to get back to playign Half-Life 1 now that it's installed on the shittop.
And I've been addicted to eating raw spaghetti for the past month or so. Not surprising considering the strength of my oral fixation. I rarely ever chew things, so the crunchiness of the dry spaghetti helps exercise my jaw to a point where I'm equally content with going back to regular oral activities. I need something to chew on...not sure where I'll find anything though.
To sum up, classes have been pretty good, friends are pretty much the same as usual (not very enthusiastic about going out of their way to do social stuff), home life is pretty relaxing and entertaining (though not nearly enough as I'd like...vidya gaems are BORING), and I have like two crushes on people at school which I shall never reveal unless I feel like revealing them. Well, one is definitely a crush, but the other is less of a crush and more of a "I like this person but I'm iffy if I'd actually want to start anything with them ever". A thing I know for sure though is that neither of them are going to see any progress any time soon, and I can probably find much better matches if I look two feet farther. Online dating doesn't seem like something I'd want to start up again until I get more of a hold on school and a social life so...yeah, I guess I'll just stick it out for a while.
Welp, I'm tired and I need sleepy times! SO...bedtime!
'Night peeps.
9.10.2011
How the hell did I even manage 1004 pageviews?
Anyway. Sorry about the hiatus, but school's been occupying my mind a lot lately and all I've been able to do is occasionally bitch about things on Twitter and my new Facebook account (which, in case you weren't aware, is now set-up and ready for friending). I think I need to see a doctor, because each night I'm coming home exhausted and end up falling asleep until dinner, then end up hanging around doing nothing until I feel like doing a couple hours of homework and crashing off to bed. It's not like I really have anything to do online, so I don't feel a strong enough urge to pull out my laptop or to bother with my mock-desktop thing. Homework has been severely easy and I'm probably fast-tracking Geography or something, so I've been doing quite a bit of homework to be able to hand in two units instead of one on Monday. I've been feeling overall just damn tired and I feel like I'm overworking myself but seem to be in a good, secure mood most of the time. For the first time ever, I can probably say it'd healthier for me to be slacking off more.
Did get that Magic: The Gathering deck the day of yester. I got "Grab for Power", and the booster pack that came with it actually consisted mostly of helpful cards. The cards are sexy and honestly they feel so much more awesome and nerdy than my Pokemon card collection of over 400 cards. And they smell so orgasmic...takes me back to the days when I used to visit the ol' card shop for Yu-Gi-Oh cards and protectors and deck boxes and all that beautiful garbage. It'd be fun to actually have someone to play against to figure out the rules and such and see if the deck is any good, but of course I won't be able to play against anyone until Monday.
It's painfully obvious that it's extremely easy for someone or something to upset me or get on my bad side. The day of yester, Scott and I went to grab me my Magic deck from Toys 'R' Us. Hayden texted me asking to come along, and I'm all like "Um...sure?", even though I knew he'd be a jerk when Scott was around and I never do anything with just Scott. Why can't I just tell people to fuck off when I want them to? Anyway...he came along and we bussed over to Limeridge and he decided to grab a drink from McDonalds before going to Toys 'R' Us, so Scott and I waited there so he could get himself a damned drink. Then we went into Toys 'R' Us and I bought the deck. Scott suggested we go back across the road to sit in the mall and look at my deck, so we headed over, and on the way Hayden decided to invite Scott over to his house - possibly for a sleepover - right in front of me. And if that didn't piss me off enough, he even took the liberty to tell me that I should call my Mom and tell her that only I'd need to be picked up. Thanks for rubbing it in, jerk.
So we went in the mall and I'm sweating hot and pissed off. Hayden drags us upstairs (I had my laptop bag with me along with my backpack, so it wasn't exactly fun for me to be walking a lot since my laptop is heavy as fuck and my bag was full of textbooks) and Scott and I looked over my deck while we waited for him to go into Hollisters to buy clothes. Afterwards we went back to his house, where I grabbed a cold drink and soon after called my Mom to pick me up as soon as she could. Funny thing is, even though I made the call right in front of them, neither of them figured out why I was leaving so soon until I called Hayden out for being a jerk. At which point he didn't even really apologize...rather, he just called himself a jerk several times. Then I was picked up, and my Mom and I grabbed Harveys for dinner. Pretty good dinner, but it didn't totally clear up my mood.
Today I've been in a pretty weird mood feeling dead and suffering from back pains and loss of will to eat. I did go to make Kraft Dinner and then forgot about it and my Mom cooked it the rest of the way for me. And we did get pizza and wings from The Bin which I actually did eat a large share of. But other than that I haven't really wanted to eat at all today. Yeah, I really need to see a doctor for so many reasons. Swept up the basement to get ready for my Mom bleaching the floor and moving my desk into the small room on the other side of the basement so I have a little office space. After installing new programs on my fresh installation of Windows 7 and spending about 6 hours trying to write this one blog post, I've finally got a bit of time to wind down and play Minecraft or something. I think. At least until Doctor Who is on.
Did get that Magic: The Gathering deck the day of yester. I got "Grab for Power", and the booster pack that came with it actually consisted mostly of helpful cards. The cards are sexy and honestly they feel so much more awesome and nerdy than my Pokemon card collection of over 400 cards. And they smell so orgasmic...takes me back to the days when I used to visit the ol' card shop for Yu-Gi-Oh cards and protectors and deck boxes and all that beautiful garbage. It'd be fun to actually have someone to play against to figure out the rules and such and see if the deck is any good, but of course I won't be able to play against anyone until Monday.
It's painfully obvious that it's extremely easy for someone or something to upset me or get on my bad side. The day of yester, Scott and I went to grab me my Magic deck from Toys 'R' Us. Hayden texted me asking to come along, and I'm all like "Um...sure?", even though I knew he'd be a jerk when Scott was around and I never do anything with just Scott. Why can't I just tell people to fuck off when I want them to? Anyway...he came along and we bussed over to Limeridge and he decided to grab a drink from McDonalds before going to Toys 'R' Us, so Scott and I waited there so he could get himself a damned drink. Then we went into Toys 'R' Us and I bought the deck. Scott suggested we go back across the road to sit in the mall and look at my deck, so we headed over, and on the way Hayden decided to invite Scott over to his house - possibly for a sleepover - right in front of me. And if that didn't piss me off enough, he even took the liberty to tell me that I should call my Mom and tell her that only I'd need to be picked up. Thanks for rubbing it in, jerk.
So we went in the mall and I'm sweating hot and pissed off. Hayden drags us upstairs (I had my laptop bag with me along with my backpack, so it wasn't exactly fun for me to be walking a lot since my laptop is heavy as fuck and my bag was full of textbooks) and Scott and I looked over my deck while we waited for him to go into Hollisters to buy clothes. Afterwards we went back to his house, where I grabbed a cold drink and soon after called my Mom to pick me up as soon as she could. Funny thing is, even though I made the call right in front of them, neither of them figured out why I was leaving so soon until I called Hayden out for being a jerk. At which point he didn't even really apologize...rather, he just called himself a jerk several times. Then I was picked up, and my Mom and I grabbed Harveys for dinner. Pretty good dinner, but it didn't totally clear up my mood.
Today I've been in a pretty weird mood feeling dead and suffering from back pains and loss of will to eat. I did go to make Kraft Dinner and then forgot about it and my Mom cooked it the rest of the way for me. And we did get pizza and wings from The Bin which I actually did eat a large share of. But other than that I haven't really wanted to eat at all today. Yeah, I really need to see a doctor for so many reasons. Swept up the basement to get ready for my Mom bleaching the floor and moving my desk into the small room on the other side of the basement so I have a little office space. After installing new programs on my fresh installation of Windows 7 and spending about 6 hours trying to write this one blog post, I've finally got a bit of time to wind down and play Minecraft or something. I think. At least until Doctor Who is on.
9.05.2011
Religion Rant!
So, as pretty much everyone already knows, I'm an atheist. I never really believed there was a god of any sort as a child, and for most of childhood pretended to be a full-on Christian but felt like I was still indecisive and that the religion itself was very unbelievable. I believe there could be some sort of deity or powerful force that rules over everything and/or had a hand in creating the universe, but I also think that humans would never be able to actually fully grasp the concept of such a powerful deity and worshiping it certainly does jack shit other than waste your time. So, that being the case, I do not believe in religion whatsoever.
Now let's start from the beginning. I think the worst part about religion has got to be the fact that parents use their children. Right from the beginning people shove their children into their religion and reprimand them and/or get all upset if they stray from the path or pick up a new religion altogether. They don't give the kid a choice; rather, they take advantage of a kid's vulnerability and programmability and hard-wire in the religion. They don't teach the kid any other options, and then the kid goes out into the world speaking like the religion is fact, and the kid ends up hating on other religions and being unaware that their own religion is just a belief and is not necessarily true. It's kinda sad when an otherwise smart kid starts talking about religion and treats someone like me like a piece of dirt because I don't follow their religion. It's like they think they automatically have power and status over me because they worship something that's more powerful than anything ever, and I'm somehow being disrespectful by not worshiping him. And what I hate above all else...when people think I should actually give a shit about the rules in the Bible, and when people tell me that it's offensive to them to see me do homosexual things and that as long as I don't actually act on it they're okay with it...yeah, I'm GAY, I'm not going to settle down with a WOMAN because I'm NOT ATTRACTED to them in that way AT ALL, and I'm certainly not going to be a fucking loner because YOU can't seem to accept that PEOPLE ARE ALL DIFFERENT and just because you CAN'T UNDERSTAND those differences doesn't mean they're automatically BAD.
People seem to hide behind religion like a security blanket. Gays are confusing and you can't understand them? Why not hate on them and then hide behind your religion and mark anything they say as a retort as "offensive" and "rude"? Well guess what: gays can't just ignore their sexual feelings, just like how straight people can't ignore their feelings. COMMON SENSE PEOPLE. Why do you think we have so many predators? Why do you think people get raped? Not because people are disrespectful, it's because their judgement is clouded by pure sexual want. And I'm sure even if they could ignore it, they'd definitely be ignoring it for the likes of you self righteous scumbags, simply because you find it offensive. /sarcasm
And then there's a simple fact that people use religion as a security blanket. Whenever something goes wrong, they turn to the blanket to make things better, and whenever somebody challenges them, they thrust their blanket forward and hide behind it. People simply don't like the image of having nobody looking out for them or the image of having nothing before and after life. They fear the idea of simply popping out of existence, wanting nothing more than to continue on living in a paradise after they finish life. They don't like the idea of getting no reward at the end of the terrible life that they've forced themselves to, so they developed religion to give them hope of something else after their dull lives finish, and to give them hope that somebody loves them infinitely and always forgives them. Seems kinda...childish.
That kinda got off topic, but oh well. If anyone can salvage something that resembles an opinion somewhere in there, feel free to agree with or combat against it in the comments below. This isn't my entire opinion, I just posted what was bugging me the most about it all right now. I generally don't memorize what I don't like about things. :P
Now let's start from the beginning. I think the worst part about religion has got to be the fact that parents use their children. Right from the beginning people shove their children into their religion and reprimand them and/or get all upset if they stray from the path or pick up a new religion altogether. They don't give the kid a choice; rather, they take advantage of a kid's vulnerability and programmability and hard-wire in the religion. They don't teach the kid any other options, and then the kid goes out into the world speaking like the religion is fact, and the kid ends up hating on other religions and being unaware that their own religion is just a belief and is not necessarily true. It's kinda sad when an otherwise smart kid starts talking about religion and treats someone like me like a piece of dirt because I don't follow their religion. It's like they think they automatically have power and status over me because they worship something that's more powerful than anything ever, and I'm somehow being disrespectful by not worshiping him. And what I hate above all else...when people think I should actually give a shit about the rules in the Bible, and when people tell me that it's offensive to them to see me do homosexual things and that as long as I don't actually act on it they're okay with it...yeah, I'm GAY, I'm not going to settle down with a WOMAN because I'm NOT ATTRACTED to them in that way AT ALL, and I'm certainly not going to be a fucking loner because YOU can't seem to accept that PEOPLE ARE ALL DIFFERENT and just because you CAN'T UNDERSTAND those differences doesn't mean they're automatically BAD.
People seem to hide behind religion like a security blanket. Gays are confusing and you can't understand them? Why not hate on them and then hide behind your religion and mark anything they say as a retort as "offensive" and "rude"? Well guess what: gays can't just ignore their sexual feelings, just like how straight people can't ignore their feelings. COMMON SENSE PEOPLE. Why do you think we have so many predators? Why do you think people get raped? Not because people are disrespectful, it's because their judgement is clouded by pure sexual want. And I'm sure even if they could ignore it, they'd definitely be ignoring it for the likes of you self righteous scumbags, simply because you find it offensive. /sarcasm
And then there's a simple fact that people use religion as a security blanket. Whenever something goes wrong, they turn to the blanket to make things better, and whenever somebody challenges them, they thrust their blanket forward and hide behind it. People simply don't like the image of having nobody looking out for them or the image of having nothing before and after life. They fear the idea of simply popping out of existence, wanting nothing more than to continue on living in a paradise after they finish life. They don't like the idea of getting no reward at the end of the terrible life that they've forced themselves to, so they developed religion to give them hope of something else after their dull lives finish, and to give them hope that somebody loves them infinitely and always forgives them. Seems kinda...childish.
That kinda got off topic, but oh well. If anyone can salvage something that resembles an opinion somewhere in there, feel free to agree with or combat against it in the comments below. This isn't my entire opinion, I just posted what was bugging me the most about it all right now. I generally don't memorize what I don't like about things. :P
Social Networking and Cats
Firstly, I'd like to mention that my cat has become a real pain in the ass and we're almost definitely giving her away. She throws up all over the carpets, she fights with the puppy, my Mom is allergic to her and I think I am slightly allergic as well, and if we get rid of her I get my own office space in the basement. So yeah...being a family of dog lovers and all, we have no reason whatsoever to keep her around.
Now that that little blurb is outta the way...
I might reactivate my Facebook account. Or create a new one. Google+ may be a helluva lot better, but the invites and the fact that I always need to spend a minute or two signing in and out of accounts so I can actually use it is super annoying. And not a lot of people actually use G+ anyways. Now, why would I want to go back to such a terrible social network anyway?
People.
Everyone uses Facebook. You rarely find a person who has not created a Facebook account. Especially if you're young and spend a lot of time on the internet, you're probably gonna have a Facebook. This may be helpful for people like me who find it impossible to chat with people throughout the comment systems of various art sites. And since I'm trying to get to know more people on the internet and have only had success doing so through social networking so far, I thought it might help to tap into the largest social network to date, giving me a wide range of social options to broaden my horizon - a horizon not limited to 140 characters like on Twitter. So in summary of all that...I hate Facebook, I really do, but would I benefit any from reactivating my account or even making a secret private one that few people I know in real life will have access to? I kinda want feedback on this, so if you wouldn't mind commenting below with your opinion that'd be awesome.
Anyway, that's about it for this blog. Seeya!
P.S. - Would anyone find it a bit more convenient if I posted a link to each new blog post on Twitter as soon as I finish them? I'm willing to do it if it'd help people to actually read the blog.
Now that that little blurb is outta the way...
I might reactivate my Facebook account. Or create a new one. Google+ may be a helluva lot better, but the invites and the fact that I always need to spend a minute or two signing in and out of accounts so I can actually use it is super annoying. And not a lot of people actually use G+ anyways. Now, why would I want to go back to such a terrible social network anyway?
People.
Everyone uses Facebook. You rarely find a person who has not created a Facebook account. Especially if you're young and spend a lot of time on the internet, you're probably gonna have a Facebook. This may be helpful for people like me who find it impossible to chat with people throughout the comment systems of various art sites. And since I'm trying to get to know more people on the internet and have only had success doing so through social networking so far, I thought it might help to tap into the largest social network to date, giving me a wide range of social options to broaden my horizon - a horizon not limited to 140 characters like on Twitter. So in summary of all that...I hate Facebook, I really do, but would I benefit any from reactivating my account or even making a secret private one that few people I know in real life will have access to? I kinda want feedback on this, so if you wouldn't mind commenting below with your opinion that'd be awesome.
Anyway, that's about it for this blog. Seeya!
P.S. - Would anyone find it a bit more convenient if I posted a link to each new blog post on Twitter as soon as I finish them? I'm willing to do it if it'd help people to actually read the blog.
9.04.2011
Bloggity blog.
I don't really feel like blogging tonight, but for some reason I keep bugging myself to do it, and I need to keep some people posted on stuff and need to show a person to my blog. I'm just in my room listening to music and feeling kinda lonely yet wanting to not delve into anything but simple conversation about random stuff while chatting to people. Drama and emotional stuff just...I don't want anything to do with it. My mind is finally starting to react to school and is preparing room for future drama and ignoring all the current stuff. One day of freedom left...
So yesterday my Mom and I went out shopping. Grabbed a number of things, but unfortunately not what I intended to get from Toys R Us, because they don't stalk that certain brand. Went all over the place doing errands and got McDonalds for lunch. Even ended up with some batteries for my old first-generation Pokemon games...those were a bitch to replace. Came home and attempted to put a new barbecue together, but of course my Mom doesn't look at the fucking pictures in the instructions and we ended up putting it together backwards and after two hours of work it had to be taken apart and put together again the right way. Good thing I wasn't around for that though...
Hayden called an hour or so before dinner and invited me over for the night. Mom dropped me off there after we gave up on the barbecue and we ordered wings for dinner and watched the new episode of Doctor Who. Hayden put in way more money towards dinner than I could...now I have an empty wallet, but it was so worth it. Did random shit like played video games and hung out on his roof and drank tea and talked. Just what I needed to get my mood out of the hole it settled down in, though I still feel extremely lonely. Sleeping was kind of weird, but I was actually able to manage it fairly well at his house in comparison to how I slept when I was camping with my Dad.
All that is what I have to blog about at the moment, At least, the personal bloggy stuff. I may rant about religion soon as well as discuss another topic. But after tonight, I may not be posting for a few days because I may not be up to it with all the confusion and testing.
So yesterday my Mom and I went out shopping. Grabbed a number of things, but unfortunately not what I intended to get from Toys R Us, because they don't stalk that certain brand. Went all over the place doing errands and got McDonalds for lunch. Even ended up with some batteries for my old first-generation Pokemon games...those were a bitch to replace. Came home and attempted to put a new barbecue together, but of course my Mom doesn't look at the fucking pictures in the instructions and we ended up putting it together backwards and after two hours of work it had to be taken apart and put together again the right way. Good thing I wasn't around for that though...
Hayden called an hour or so before dinner and invited me over for the night. Mom dropped me off there after we gave up on the barbecue and we ordered wings for dinner and watched the new episode of Doctor Who. Hayden put in way more money towards dinner than I could...now I have an empty wallet, but it was so worth it. Did random shit like played video games and hung out on his roof and drank tea and talked. Just what I needed to get my mood out of the hole it settled down in, though I still feel extremely lonely. Sleeping was kind of weird, but I was actually able to manage it fairly well at his house in comparison to how I slept when I was camping with my Dad.
All that is what I have to blog about at the moment, At least, the personal bloggy stuff. I may rant about religion soon as well as discuss another topic. But after tonight, I may not be posting for a few days because I may not be up to it with all the confusion and testing.
9.02.2011
So basically what has been going through my mind.
You know how I always seem to give a lot less of a shit about everything that happens to me? Like, people will say stuff to me or about me and it won't affect me at all? That's because I've pretty much got two halves to my thinking: the older, more mature one that refuses to ever give up control, and the immature little brat that sits there pouting and crying in the back of my head, deeply ingrained within my subconscious. My main line of thinking never really gives a shit about whatever anyone says, but subconsciously I'll be hurting throughout the day, and sometimes it'll take over a bit and give me really weird mood swings. I don't know why the fuck my brain thinks it should pretty much split my thoughts between two personas and shove all the good stuff into the main one and throw the scraps to the subconsciousy one, but it does, and it can be extremely convenient for pretending that I'm totally okay while really part of me is having a mental breakdown on the inside.
I don't know if I explained that well enough, but whatever, that's the best I can do right now. :P
Since I'm going back to school to see all the people I've had weird mixed emotional qualms with, doing two fairly large and important tests within the first three days (math exam and EQAO), having to put up with the Science teacher I had last year and hate so much throughout the entire semester (first thing in the morning, too, so first class to start the school year), and having no clue whatsoever who I'm going to hang out with during breaks and such...my brain has been feeding my weaker, sunconsciousy half - which is basically a whiny inner child - all the bad thoughts to get me prepped for school. I actually have zero care about what happens on the first day and have been in complete physical bliss over the past couple days...but in between activities my subconsciousy bit takes over and wipes the bad emotion all over the good ones I have been trying to put in place.
So yeah...in case you wanted to know why I'm simultaneously happy yet suddenly depressed at times, all that is the reason...I think. I'm not exactly the best at making a clear translation from thought to paper/internet, but I sorta wrote what I could and hopefully at least a person or two will actually understand it. But probably not.
I don't know if I explained that well enough, but whatever, that's the best I can do right now. :P
Since I'm going back to school to see all the people I've had weird mixed emotional qualms with, doing two fairly large and important tests within the first three days (math exam and EQAO), having to put up with the Science teacher I had last year and hate so much throughout the entire semester (first thing in the morning, too, so first class to start the school year), and having no clue whatsoever who I'm going to hang out with during breaks and such...my brain has been feeding my weaker, sunconsciousy half - which is basically a whiny inner child - all the bad thoughts to get me prepped for school. I actually have zero care about what happens on the first day and have been in complete physical bliss over the past couple days...but in between activities my subconsciousy bit takes over and wipes the bad emotion all over the good ones I have been trying to put in place.
So yeah...in case you wanted to know why I'm simultaneously happy yet suddenly depressed at times, all that is the reason...I think. I'm not exactly the best at making a clear translation from thought to paper/internet, but I sorta wrote what I could and hopefully at least a person or two will actually understand it. But probably not.
Shopping! (day trip to the US)
So as I was sitting around waiting for a huge load of laundry to dry, my Mom phones and alerts me that she wants to go to the US and that she'd be home at 1:15 (25 minutes after the call) to pick us up and head over the border. As soon as I heard this I...announced it to Twitter. :P Then I went and grabbed a shower and threw on whatever clothes I had leftover in my dresser and jumped in the car.
After going into the fabric store and grabbing the supplies my Mom needed to continue work on the quilt she's making for my bed, we headed out and basically roamed around stores such as Wal Mart, Kmart, Target, and RadioShack, looking to see if there was anything cheap we wanted to pick up. My Mom picked my brother and I out a couple laptop pad things for our laps that have little extendable mouse pads in them. It also protects my balls from the excess heat produced by the machine, since mine is so old it overheats during normal usage. We also got candy corn, tons of soda, and went out for lunch to Wendys and had dinner at Ponerosa or whatever the place was called. For lunch: bacon deluxe combo. For dinner: FRIED SHRIMPIES! :D (in case you didn't know, shrimp are like my all-time favourite food)
On the way back we stopped at Dave's house (y'know, my Mom's most recent love interest) and quickly fled from there with him to grab a snack at DQ. I was boring and had a slushie. After that we went back to his place and dropped him back home...well...he went home after my Mom sat in the grass and talked to him while I was hanging out the car window resting my head on the roof of the car and sipping my Mom's coffee that she picked up at some point and still had a fair amount of warmth to it. (that totally wasn't a run-on sentence shhh)
Then we headed home. the drive wasn't very eventful other than my Mom and I talking about every uncomfortable thing possible while my brother was half-dead listening to his iPod. I clarified a lot to her about my fetish, but she still thinks I'm gonna end up with a wife...haha, yeah, you keep thinking that.
So anyway. Tomorrow we're going to Toys R Us, and other than that, I have jack shit planned to do before school starts up again on Tuesday. Yippee. I think I'll just tell my "inner child" to stop being such a nervous wreck and try to enjoy the last bit of freedom I have. (I'll explain in the next blog post :P)
Welp, that's about all I have to say. Today was pretty fun and eventful, and I'm tired and ready for another night of watching Disney movies on my own. Yup...
After going into the fabric store and grabbing the supplies my Mom needed to continue work on the quilt she's making for my bed, we headed out and basically roamed around stores such as Wal Mart, Kmart, Target, and RadioShack, looking to see if there was anything cheap we wanted to pick up. My Mom picked my brother and I out a couple laptop pad things for our laps that have little extendable mouse pads in them. It also protects my balls from the excess heat produced by the machine, since mine is so old it overheats during normal usage. We also got candy corn, tons of soda, and went out for lunch to Wendys and had dinner at Ponerosa or whatever the place was called. For lunch: bacon deluxe combo. For dinner: FRIED SHRIMPIES! :D (in case you didn't know, shrimp are like my all-time favourite food)
On the way back we stopped at Dave's house (y'know, my Mom's most recent love interest) and quickly fled from there with him to grab a snack at DQ. I was boring and had a slushie. After that we went back to his place and dropped him back home...well...he went home after my Mom sat in the grass and talked to him while I was hanging out the car window resting my head on the roof of the car and sipping my Mom's coffee that she picked up at some point and still had a fair amount of warmth to it. (that totally wasn't a run-on sentence shhh)
Then we headed home. the drive wasn't very eventful other than my Mom and I talking about every uncomfortable thing possible while my brother was half-dead listening to his iPod. I clarified a lot to her about my fetish, but she still thinks I'm gonna end up with a wife...haha, yeah, you keep thinking that.
So anyway. Tomorrow we're going to Toys R Us, and other than that, I have jack shit planned to do before school starts up again on Tuesday. Yippee. I think I'll just tell my "inner child" to stop being such a nervous wreck and try to enjoy the last bit of freedom I have. (I'll explain in the next blog post :P)
Welp, that's about all I have to say. Today was pretty fun and eventful, and I'm tired and ready for another night of watching Disney movies on my own. Yup...
9.01.2011
Hopefully not too annoying...
...but I switched some things around. Firstly, there are no longer ads between the posts! Since they collected no revenue unless you clicked them, it was kinda pointless. Then I also changed around the names and dates underneath the blog titles so that the names actually fit. And, to make it a lot easier to scroll down to the bottom of things, there are now only 3 blog posts on the main page. This'll also help you people that have slow connections or computers and need that little bit of content cut off to make loading times easier.
That's about it for changes, I think...oh, I did add some sort of "Reaction" bar so those who are too lazy to comment can pick one-word reactions to the content of each individual blog. *goes to test it himself* This post looks rather 'boring'...
EDIT: Broke reactions. Can't have more than 4. This is pointless... *removes*
That's about it for changes, I think...oh, I did add some sort of "Reaction" bar so those who are too lazy to comment can pick one-word reactions to the content of each individual blog. *goes to test it himself* This post looks rather 'boring'...
EDIT: Broke reactions. Can't have more than 4. This is pointless... *removes*
8.31.2011
New Blogger Editor Layout!
It looks extremely sexy, if impossible to navigate and way too insanely white and clean. That's all I have to say on the matter.
EDIT: I also decided to change my username from shadowpangolin to [SP] as it fits better in the little "by" blurb underneath the title line.
MORE EDIT: So it apparently doesn't fit in any way whatsoever. But I'll keep it as [SP] for now because I guess that's easier to respond to? Also I need to figure out how to post user icons beside blog posts...
EDIT: I also decided to change my username from shadowpangolin to [SP] as it fits better in the little "by" blurb underneath the title line.
MORE EDIT: So it apparently doesn't fit in any way whatsoever. But I'll keep it as [SP] for now because I guess that's easier to respond to? Also I need to figure out how to post user icons beside blog posts...
Vlog Status and...a LIST.
The vlog is going to be started sometime soon... I'm not giving any more dates as I'll probably just procrastinate them again. Though the fact that my Bluetooth headset is working with my laptop is a good push in the right direction. I still am too lazy to figure out what software I'm gonna resort to using to record and edit the video clips for the blog, so once I get that done it'll only be a matter of organizing my thoughts and getting it done.
Now, for a list of things I hope to start doing more of. I think I really need to get into more activities than just playing video games and sitting in front of my laptop every day. So I'm thinking of a few things I'd like to get into my routine so I can get better at them and have more to me than just being lazy on the internet.
- GUITAR. I wanna pick it up again. The problem is, I don't know what songs to try doing that'll sound any good on my acoustic guitar that's collecting dust in my bedroom. Maybe I'll start with something incredibly simple and meh, then work up to things I really enjoy like some older Sum 41 songs.
- EXERCISE. You heard me right. I need an exercise routine! I think I'll start by doing some push-ups and sit-ups every night and morning or something. That'll be easy enough to start off. I've done it before, but I hadn't really made it an "official" part of my routine until maybe now.
- CODING. Augh I really need to get back into this. Since I came back to Ubuntu Linux, I have been finding a few things difficult to adjust to. And even though I'm all like, "that could take two seconds to fix with a string of code and a bit of know-how" I never bother doing anything about it. Though I don't really know where to start as far as coding goes. I kinda also wanna try setting up a sort of file system on my flash drive that can act both as just a file browser in another OS or even a standalone OS itself. But that's very far down the road...maybe I should play around with Linux distros first?
- WRITING AND DRAWING. I need to get back into these....as soon as school starts I will try and do some stuff, but it's so hard to push out my thoughts onto paper and such...
That's my (small) list. Doubt I'll actually take any action on any of those things. I'd also like to get into cooking a bit more, but y'know...low attention span.
So yeah...vlog sometime soon, and I'm gonna try doing more stuff to keep my mind occupied from all the stupidity in the world.
Devan out...
Now, for a list of things I hope to start doing more of. I think I really need to get into more activities than just playing video games and sitting in front of my laptop every day. So I'm thinking of a few things I'd like to get into my routine so I can get better at them and have more to me than just being lazy on the internet.
- GUITAR. I wanna pick it up again. The problem is, I don't know what songs to try doing that'll sound any good on my acoustic guitar that's collecting dust in my bedroom. Maybe I'll start with something incredibly simple and meh, then work up to things I really enjoy like some older Sum 41 songs.
- EXERCISE. You heard me right. I need an exercise routine! I think I'll start by doing some push-ups and sit-ups every night and morning or something. That'll be easy enough to start off. I've done it before, but I hadn't really made it an "official" part of my routine until maybe now.
- CODING. Augh I really need to get back into this. Since I came back to Ubuntu Linux, I have been finding a few things difficult to adjust to. And even though I'm all like, "that could take two seconds to fix with a string of code and a bit of know-how" I never bother doing anything about it. Though I don't really know where to start as far as coding goes. I kinda also wanna try setting up a sort of file system on my flash drive that can act both as just a file browser in another OS or even a standalone OS itself. But that's very far down the road...maybe I should play around with Linux distros first?
- WRITING AND DRAWING. I need to get back into these....as soon as school starts I will try and do some stuff, but it's so hard to push out my thoughts onto paper and such...
That's my (small) list. Doubt I'll actually take any action on any of those things. I'd also like to get into cooking a bit more, but y'know...low attention span.
So yeah...vlog sometime soon, and I'm gonna try doing more stuff to keep my mind occupied from all the stupidity in the world.
Devan out...
8.30.2011
Plans for the night.
Yeah, not day, NIGHT. I plan on staying up all night. Because I'm extremely lonely and because I have no plans whatsoever tomorrow. Also because I suddenly have an urge to do things and also would rather do my flyers at night rather than during the day. So here's what I'll be doing tonight:
- SNACKS. I'm gonna have a cup of tea and maybe some food to start out the night so I don't run out of energy Already in my pajamas, so they'll be lighter, thinner, and more comfortable than my jeans, and will help a lot to conserve energy too.
- FORUM. I shall resurrect my dead forum by posting in a ton of threads and making new ones, INCLUDING A THREAD FOR DISCUSSING WESTMOUNT TIMETABLES. If you don't remember the URL, it's http://boredomandresolution.forumotion.ca/, and we desperately need new members and activity. D:
- TRANSFORMICE. I will play a bit of it tonight and try to once again become addicted to it during this next week or two, in memory of last summer. Also I have an alt account for new objects that came out that I want but don't wanna wear on my regular account, so I'll need 150 cheese to earn just the first thing. If you're interested, I MAY play in a private room with someone while on my alt account, provided they aren't one of the like...3 people I haven't told stuff yet. :P
- MOVIES. I needa watch one badly. I'll probably end up watching Lady and the Tramp or something. Just something to wind down and cuddle up with a plushie to.
- FLYERS. I'll do those tonight as well, so I have more time to...be lazy and useless all day tomorrow. Maybe I'll start taking some advice from that list I read earlier and put it to use. An exercise schedule surely wouldn't hurt, and maybe I should learn to cook more foods and play guitar and stuff.
And of course I'll still talk to people, and possibly play video games or something halfway through or when I'm finished everything. But for now, I'll just work at the list. Chow! *sulks off to get food*
- SNACKS. I'm gonna have a cup of tea and maybe some food to start out the night so I don't run out of energy Already in my pajamas, so they'll be lighter, thinner, and more comfortable than my jeans, and will help a lot to conserve energy too.
- FORUM. I shall resurrect my dead forum by posting in a ton of threads and making new ones, INCLUDING A THREAD FOR DISCUSSING WESTMOUNT TIMETABLES. If you don't remember the URL, it's http://boredomandresolution.forumotion.ca/, and we desperately need new members and activity. D:
- TRANSFORMICE. I will play a bit of it tonight and try to once again become addicted to it during this next week or two, in memory of last summer. Also I have an alt account for new objects that came out that I want but don't wanna wear on my regular account, so I'll need 150 cheese to earn just the first thing. If you're interested, I MAY play in a private room with someone while on my alt account, provided they aren't one of the like...3 people I haven't told stuff yet. :P
- MOVIES. I needa watch one badly. I'll probably end up watching Lady and the Tramp or something. Just something to wind down and cuddle up with a plushie to.
- FLYERS. I'll do those tonight as well, so I have more time to...be lazy and useless all day tomorrow. Maybe I'll start taking some advice from that list I read earlier and put it to use. An exercise schedule surely wouldn't hurt, and maybe I should learn to cook more foods and play guitar and stuff.
And of course I'll still talk to people, and possibly play video games or something halfway through or when I'm finished everything. But for now, I'll just work at the list. Chow! *sulks off to get food*
Camping! (with pictures and stuff)
In case you didn't notice, I was away for the entire weekend. I went camping with my Dad and brother up to MacGregor Point Provincial Park. It wasn't all that bad actually, spending a weekend with the old man who I barely ever see or even talk to. We did a lot of biking along the trails in the park (of course I got lost and separated from the group), went to the beach (the water was shallow and freezing cold, but not at all crowded), explored the nearby town (where my Dad bought the entire Lord of the Rings trilogy in one book), ate a lot of fast food, had campfires and roasted things over them, ate ice cream at the park store...you know, camping things.
Here's part of the view from up at the top of the observation tower near the middle of the trail. :P
WATER. Doesn't that shit look ice cold? It was pretty damn cold...and people were swimming in it!
There's a fucking turtle on that rock...see it? SEE THE FUCKING TURTLE?! It is a goddamned big deal, and you should be molesting the fuck out of the image of that turtle with your puny little eyes.
That's the old man himself. And more of the beach. It's not the main beach, just a small secluded strip off one of the bike trails we went down. The entire fucking campground was pretty much a giant beach.
Another fucking turtle. Coulda touched that shit. Better appreciate that shelled bastard, foo'.
Yes that is my pale hand and yes those are huge marshmallows. They're like...8 times as big as normal marshmallows. I ate an entire two, and my fatass brother had three. We never even got through half the bag...
Our shrine to the iced tea gods. I have no fucking clue why my Dad decided we should throw our cans beside the goddamned fire pit when we were done with them. At the end of the trip we put them back in the box and took them to the recycling bins...why didn't we just throw them in the box in the first place?
More beach. This was actually at sunset point, I think. That was such an awesome spot to be...I almost wish we could've had a picnic or something there rather than just stopping in in the middle of a bike ride.
So here's a froggy. Not as great as the almighty turtles, but still pretty damn cool. He let me get right up to him. Dunno why, maybe I'm good at approaching slimy pond things? Whatever, this thing is the shit.
My ugly brother creature! Don't dwell on this image too long or you'll get eye herpes.
Oh, and here's a picture of my feet. Dammit, my crotch sticks out a ton and got into the picture. >.<
So yeah, that's camping...anyway time to go eat something now.
So yeah, that's camping...anyway time to go eat something now.
>yfw I actually blog
I accidentaly just posted that. Fail
Anywho, I haven't posted in like..... 3 weeks maybe? I dunno, some dumb shit like that.
BESIDES THAT What is up beautiful people? I'm Nick, and I don't have an intro, saying I don't have an intro is my intro.
Wait,you may already know me.
Fuck.
I haven't been doing much at all lately.
I did win my soccer game today.^.^
I'm now sad it was my last game.
I also have a theme song now: http://soundcloud.com/drainpuppet/nick
Bye
8.29.2011
School - Schedule
School next week. I've already confirmed a couple classes with both a grade 9 and a grade 10 at Westmount. I have Mr. Clark as an advisor, and here's my schedule thus far:
SEMESTER 1
1 - Grade 9 Gifted Science - Ms. Millar - 210
2 - Grade 10 Gifted History - Mr. Paterson - 225
3 - Grade 9 Academic Geography - Kalogiros - 235
4 - LUNCH
5 - Grade 9 Gifted Math - Mr. Worthington - 100
SEMESTER 2
1 - Grade 10 Gifted English - Mr. Cox - 121
2 - Grade 10 Academic Math - Ms. Lackovic - Portable 1
3 - Grade 10 Academic Science - Mr. Tole - 206
4 - LUNCH
5 - Grade 10 Careers - Mrs. Ruff - 227
So as you can see I have grade 9 courses in there. For those who don't know the full story, I was very slow in completing some of my grade 9 courses due to "laziness", or in my eyes, depression and a large hate for the world. Math in period 5 I have 3 days of (EQAO testing and the exam) as soon as I get back, then I have to finish French in that period (I'm a little past 50% done already...about 11 or 12 units) and I also have to redo Geography and Science. I could've finished Science but I was just really butthurt about the damn teacher and the fact they placed me in academic rather than gifted. Also nobody would talk to me, except the guys in my carryover class who occasionally tried talking to me. The girls were all ditsy jerks though. Geography...I just couldn't pay attention to it. I really was messed up in the head then and definitely shouldn't have been in school.
But I guess all this works out, because a couple of my friends are in my grade 9 classes too. Or rather, one friend is in a couple of my classes. Maybe I'll recognize more people when the first day comes around...
Yeah, I'm gonna have to study for my Math testing this weekend sometime. Though my top priority will be seeing everyone I know before I go back to school. Friends matter a lot more to my sanity than a few stupid test scores. :P
SEMESTER 1
1 - Grade 9 Gifted Science - Ms. Millar - 210
2 - Grade 10 Gifted History - Mr. Paterson - 225
3 - Grade 9 Academic Geography - Kalogiros - 235
4 - LUNCH
5 - Grade 9 Gifted Math - Mr. Worthington - 100
SEMESTER 2
1 - Grade 10 Gifted English - Mr. Cox - 121
2 - Grade 10 Academic Math - Ms. Lackovic - Portable 1
3 - Grade 10 Academic Science - Mr. Tole - 206
4 - LUNCH
5 - Grade 10 Careers - Mrs. Ruff - 227
So as you can see I have grade 9 courses in there. For those who don't know the full story, I was very slow in completing some of my grade 9 courses due to "laziness", or in my eyes, depression and a large hate for the world. Math in period 5 I have 3 days of (EQAO testing and the exam) as soon as I get back, then I have to finish French in that period (I'm a little past 50% done already...about 11 or 12 units) and I also have to redo Geography and Science. I could've finished Science but I was just really butthurt about the damn teacher and the fact they placed me in academic rather than gifted. Also nobody would talk to me, except the guys in my carryover class who occasionally tried talking to me. The girls were all ditsy jerks though. Geography...I just couldn't pay attention to it. I really was messed up in the head then and definitely shouldn't have been in school.
But I guess all this works out, because a couple of my friends are in my grade 9 classes too. Or rather, one friend is in a couple of my classes. Maybe I'll recognize more people when the first day comes around...
Yeah, I'm gonna have to study for my Math testing this weekend sometime. Though my top priority will be seeing everyone I know before I go back to school. Friends matter a lot more to my sanity than a few stupid test scores. :P
8.28.2011
I'M BACK AND ALIVE.
I shall ACTUALLY blog tomorrow. Same with the vlog...forgot to do it before I left. >.< Oh well. More to talk about now anyways.
So I'm really tired now. My Mom talked to me for like an hour and I missed 3 people, then I went for a shower and lost two of the same people as well as one different person. Heh. Sorry guys. Especially Davy, since I kinda deserted him in the middle of stuff and then he had to go to bed. :C
Ima get juice, then Ima go to bed. It's still early but I'm really tired and feeling...not stay-uppyish? I'll see y'all in the morning...hopefully. 'Night peeps! *slumps off to get teh juices*
So I'm really tired now. My Mom talked to me for like an hour and I missed 3 people, then I went for a shower and lost two of the same people as well as one different person. Heh. Sorry guys. Especially Davy, since I kinda deserted him in the middle of stuff and then he had to go to bed. :C
Ima get juice, then Ima go to bed. It's still early but I'm really tired and feeling...not stay-uppyish? I'll see y'all in the morning...hopefully. 'Night peeps! *slumps off to get teh juices*
8.24.2011
:P
12:45 - Cleaning ladies woke me up. Thankfully somebody didn't actually come into my room and confront me until after I had heard them downstairs and shoved anything I didn't want visible into my desk. Must've been pretty weird for the cleaning ladies to see me going to the basement with a bunch of cables, my laptop, and a PS3 controller...while still in my pajamas. Hung out playing GTA in the basement for an hour or two, then let the dog loose and cooked up a couple pizza pops and played more PS3.
3:40 - Puppy took a shit on my bed and I had to wash the comforter. After throwing that in the washer I grabbed a long shower and after getting clothed and everything I went and grabbed the mail. Spent the rest of the afternoon chilling around and using my laptop because I couldn't start my flyers as I was going to see a new house with my Mom an hour later.
6:30(?) - Picked up Wendys for just my Mom and I. The house was really nice although incredibly small and even though I knew it'd be the best we could afford, I wasn't happy about how much we'd have to downsize, and when I was honest with my Mom about how I felt about the house, she flipped her shit and thought I was being moody and ungrateful. After I used a simile to communicate how I was feeling and got her to finally calm down and have a rational conversation, we ended up at Wendy's.
Now I'm just sitting here, finishing off a baconator and a thing of fries. It's taking me a long time to eat as I feel kinda shitty and cold right now (I'm even wearing a hoodie) and I am also paying more attention to writing this. On top of all that, I'm kinda procrastinating with putting together my flyers...I'll get them as soon as I finish this blog.
I don't know what happened as far as sleeping went. Went to bed around 12am and got up at 12:45pm...almost 13 hours of sleep, and I even went to bed early. Makes no sense whatsoever. I probably am extremely sick...my sex drive is feeling extremely dull and almost non-existent, a large hint my body always gives me when it feels I'm not doing so great. I also have barely any motivation to complain or say anything on Twitter, which is unusual since I usually spam the fuck out of it.
All this won't impede on the vlog so long as I find enough things to talk about in time. And maybe I need to find video editing and capturing software...and the capturing software will need to work in Ubuntu 10.10. Though I can edit the video on my OTHER laptop...the one with the broken monitor and all. If I can't find anything that works on this thing, I'll have to somehow figure out a way to cam on my other laptop...or y'know, my video camera or phone.
Flyers now. I may be on the internet in a couple hours, but don't count on it. I feel in the mood for something solitary like PS3 or Minecraft or something. Maybe a movie. Anything where I don't have to contribute to a conversation would be good. It seems like all my friends require a large amount of input when it comes to talking to them, and they won't keep talking if I act like Scott and say nothing or just give one-word answers. Also they'll eventually want to spill personal details on me, and I can't deal with someone else pushing problems or expectations of any sort on me when I'm unable to pull out of a mood myself. Maybe tomorrow I'll talk to people? If not I'll have my phone with me during the camping trip, and it'll be on at all times unless I run out of data or end up camping where there's no signal or roaming charges. So yeah...seeya.
3:40 - Puppy took a shit on my bed and I had to wash the comforter. After throwing that in the washer I grabbed a long shower and after getting clothed and everything I went and grabbed the mail. Spent the rest of the afternoon chilling around and using my laptop because I couldn't start my flyers as I was going to see a new house with my Mom an hour later.
6:30(?) - Picked up Wendys for just my Mom and I. The house was really nice although incredibly small and even though I knew it'd be the best we could afford, I wasn't happy about how much we'd have to downsize, and when I was honest with my Mom about how I felt about the house, she flipped her shit and thought I was being moody and ungrateful. After I used a simile to communicate how I was feeling and got her to finally calm down and have a rational conversation, we ended up at Wendy's.
Now I'm just sitting here, finishing off a baconator and a thing of fries. It's taking me a long time to eat as I feel kinda shitty and cold right now (I'm even wearing a hoodie) and I am also paying more attention to writing this. On top of all that, I'm kinda procrastinating with putting together my flyers...I'll get them as soon as I finish this blog.
I don't know what happened as far as sleeping went. Went to bed around 12am and got up at 12:45pm...almost 13 hours of sleep, and I even went to bed early. Makes no sense whatsoever. I probably am extremely sick...my sex drive is feeling extremely dull and almost non-existent, a large hint my body always gives me when it feels I'm not doing so great. I also have barely any motivation to complain or say anything on Twitter, which is unusual since I usually spam the fuck out of it.
All this won't impede on the vlog so long as I find enough things to talk about in time. And maybe I need to find video editing and capturing software...and the capturing software will need to work in Ubuntu 10.10. Though I can edit the video on my OTHER laptop...the one with the broken monitor and all. If I can't find anything that works on this thing, I'll have to somehow figure out a way to cam on my other laptop...or y'know, my video camera or phone.
Flyers now. I may be on the internet in a couple hours, but don't count on it. I feel in the mood for something solitary like PS3 or Minecraft or something. Maybe a movie. Anything where I don't have to contribute to a conversation would be good. It seems like all my friends require a large amount of input when it comes to talking to them, and they won't keep talking if I act like Scott and say nothing or just give one-word answers. Also they'll eventually want to spill personal details on me, and I can't deal with someone else pushing problems or expectations of any sort on me when I'm unable to pull out of a mood myself. Maybe tomorrow I'll talk to people? If not I'll have my phone with me during the camping trip, and it'll be on at all times unless I run out of data or end up camping where there's no signal or roaming charges. So yeah...seeya.
8.23.2011
*yawn*
I'm pretty content and exhausted after today. Didn't finish the book I was reading until 3am, and ended up lying there in bed for like a half hour to an hour before finally falling asleep. Got woken up around 7am and rushed to get ready. As soon as I had everything, I made my way over to Hayden's house...well, I did once I received his address halfway to his neighborhood (yeah, I didn't ask for his address, I'm such an idiot). We spent the first little part of the morning playing LittleBigPlanet on Hayden's new PS3 and talked about just any random stuff. After we had enough of that, we decided to hop on the city bus and check out 1UP Games, EB Games, and Gamestop for some cheap games (in that order).
1UP Games proved to be rather expensive, so Hayden decided to grab the games he wanted at the Gamestop in Limeridge Mall instead. As soon as we had the games, Hayden decided to go down to the food court for a snack. He bought each of us a mini burrito thing from Taco Bell. They were filled with really drippy meat, tomatoes, cheese, and probably one more thing but I don't remember what it was. I ended up getting it all over my hand, but that's what tongues are for.
After all that we decided to go pester Nick. Arrived at his house just as he was pulling into the driveway. His friend Colin was there and the four of us hung around his place for a bit before walking out to Colin's house and then coming back immediately after...simply so Colin could change from jeans into shorts. Then we hung around Nick's place a few minutes more and I grabbed my copy of LittleBigPlanet Game of the Year Edition back from him and got the $10 he owed me. We capped off the afternoon with Slurpees (I bought for Hayden since he bought me the burrito thing) and we parted our different ways on the way back to our separate destinations.
Dinner at Hayden's house was pretty nerve-wracking until his uncle left the table about 5 minutes into eating. Then it was just Hayden, his grandmother, and I attempting to tame and eat the wild beast of a meal that is spaghetti. I turned down everything except a bottle of water and the main course as I had already had the large Slurpee, and my stomach gets a bit weird when I'm uneasy around someone such as Hayden's uncle. When we finished up we went out to the backyard and did some beanbag tossing with his little cousin. Well, it was more like "watching Hayden spin his little cousin around and wrestle him" than just ordinary beanbag tossing.
Everyone but the two of us had to leave for a soccer game, so we both went down to the basement and talked for a bit before finally deciding to pass the time with the only other multiplayer game Hayden had that wasn't LBP or whatever that terrible sports game he had was.
We played Call of Duty: Black Ops.
It was actually really enjoyable. I don't know why. Maybe because I was actually decent at it for once. We won most of the games and I even warmed up to Hayden's stupid grippy things that he dished out $5 for just so he could have curved triggers. We played on the internet for most of the time, but at the end of that we did a couple rounds of zombies. Then his grandmother came back, so we had to pack-up. I got a lift home, and Hayden gave me one of his Bluetooth headsets and I let him borrow Fallout 3.
Overall it has been a good day (although tiring) and I really feel a ton better after getting out of the house and hanging out with Hayden. All I've done since I've gotten home is put away my loose change and games and stuff and set up my laptop to do this blog post. I think I'm gonna call it early tonight since I'm so tired and had a full day of not-so-boring stuff. Pizza Pops are always a good late-night snack, so I'm just gonna scarf down a couple of those and head off to bed right after. My favourite earphones seem to have decided to work in both ears tonight, so that's a plus. I think I'll just play Minecraft or do some social networking while I listen to music and await my precious pizza-stuffed delicacies' decent to room temperature.
Oh, and just to be clear, my Dad decided to pick my brother and I up a day later (now Friday night) so I have an extra night of talking and whatnot. and I may delay the vlog to a day later than planned because I have that extra little bit of time and still need to decide on what all to do for it exactly.
So I'm gonna go make those pizza things now. I'll probably post a short blog in the morning or something because I don't feel like I've spilled all my thoughts, but I feel too tired to post everything now. Seeya!
1UP Games proved to be rather expensive, so Hayden decided to grab the games he wanted at the Gamestop in Limeridge Mall instead. As soon as we had the games, Hayden decided to go down to the food court for a snack. He bought each of us a mini burrito thing from Taco Bell. They were filled with really drippy meat, tomatoes, cheese, and probably one more thing but I don't remember what it was. I ended up getting it all over my hand, but that's what tongues are for.
After all that we decided to go pester Nick. Arrived at his house just as he was pulling into the driveway. His friend Colin was there and the four of us hung around his place for a bit before walking out to Colin's house and then coming back immediately after...simply so Colin could change from jeans into shorts. Then we hung around Nick's place a few minutes more and I grabbed my copy of LittleBigPlanet Game of the Year Edition back from him and got the $10 he owed me. We capped off the afternoon with Slurpees (I bought for Hayden since he bought me the burrito thing) and we parted our different ways on the way back to our separate destinations.
Dinner at Hayden's house was pretty nerve-wracking until his uncle left the table about 5 minutes into eating. Then it was just Hayden, his grandmother, and I attempting to tame and eat the wild beast of a meal that is spaghetti. I turned down everything except a bottle of water and the main course as I had already had the large Slurpee, and my stomach gets a bit weird when I'm uneasy around someone such as Hayden's uncle. When we finished up we went out to the backyard and did some beanbag tossing with his little cousin. Well, it was more like "watching Hayden spin his little cousin around and wrestle him" than just ordinary beanbag tossing.
Everyone but the two of us had to leave for a soccer game, so we both went down to the basement and talked for a bit before finally deciding to pass the time with the only other multiplayer game Hayden had that wasn't LBP or whatever that terrible sports game he had was.
We played Call of Duty: Black Ops.
It was actually really enjoyable. I don't know why. Maybe because I was actually decent at it for once. We won most of the games and I even warmed up to Hayden's stupid grippy things that he dished out $5 for just so he could have curved triggers. We played on the internet for most of the time, but at the end of that we did a couple rounds of zombies. Then his grandmother came back, so we had to pack-up. I got a lift home, and Hayden gave me one of his Bluetooth headsets and I let him borrow Fallout 3.
Overall it has been a good day (although tiring) and I really feel a ton better after getting out of the house and hanging out with Hayden. All I've done since I've gotten home is put away my loose change and games and stuff and set up my laptop to do this blog post. I think I'm gonna call it early tonight since I'm so tired and had a full day of not-so-boring stuff. Pizza Pops are always a good late-night snack, so I'm just gonna scarf down a couple of those and head off to bed right after. My favourite earphones seem to have decided to work in both ears tonight, so that's a plus. I think I'll just play Minecraft or do some social networking while I listen to music and await my precious pizza-stuffed delicacies' decent to room temperature.
Oh, and just to be clear, my Dad decided to pick my brother and I up a day later (now Friday night) so I have an extra night of talking and whatnot. and I may delay the vlog to a day later than planned because I have that extra little bit of time and still need to decide on what all to do for it exactly.
So I'm gonna go make those pizza things now. I'll probably post a short blog in the morning or something because I don't feel like I've spilled all my thoughts, but I feel too tired to post everything now. Seeya!
Twitter thing added...also can the world just go away?
Unless you're looking at the mobile page, you'll probably notice that I've added the Twitter widget to the gadget bar off to the right. So for those of you that don't want to bother with Twitter but are curious about what I post on there, just move your eyes a couple hundred pixels over and check it out. But if you're reading this and you see any posts about being depressed, I apologize for that, as I'm not in the best mood right now.
In case you wanted to know why I'm suddenly feeling depressed, here's my spiel. So basically Scott and I had planned sometime last week that we'd hang out on Sunday, and he had to bump it to today due to "family plans". Well, as far as I know, he blew me off yet again with the excuse that he hadn't asked his parents yet and they were out so he couldn't ask now (even though his parents wouldn't have given a shit), and most likely just sat around playing video games and ignoring me when I tried to talk to him after he gave me his excuse.
That's not the only thing though...for a while I've just been feeling like my friends are slowly drifting away. Three already over the past little while have just kinda dropped outside of the radar and I never talk to them online and thus never see them in the flesh. Other friends I'm starting to talk to less and less too, and my online life seems to be getting gradually more awesome but also seems to impede any progress made with "real-life" friends. And since some of my closest friends are never able to hang out with me and I don't really feel a strong bond with anyone, it's all starting to pile-up and affect me greatly. Doesn't help that I've been sick the last couple of days, been busy doing "slave labor" as my Mom calls it (my flyer route), and every other day I have to tidy and vacate my own home so some person(s) can march in and judge the way my family lives. Last night was the one time I was actually able to get a good sleep over the past few days, and even that was cut short because of the 9:45-10:45 showing in the morning.
I think I'll be alright come tomorrow morning. I sure hope so...I don't wanna be in one of my "moods" to hang out with Hayden. I'll probably have more positive input for Twitter and the blog almost as soon as I wake up. Or at least more usual input. :P Still kinda psyched to start vlogging, which I think I'll do Wednesday just before I leave for camping Thursday through Monday. No idea what I'll use to put it together...
And that's about that. I feel a bit calmer and happier already now that I've vented a bit, but I still don't want anything more to do with people tonight. The best idea now is to grab a warm diet coke, a book, my wolf, and my iPod for a good couple hours of reading before bed. Getting immersed in a new world really helps to take away the pain and stress from this world. So unless you really wanna text me because you have something extremely important or just want to be a prick and spam me with one-word texts to which I will reply with rather inappropriate language, I'll be ignoring the internet until morning.
Until then...g'night! :3
In case you wanted to know why I'm suddenly feeling depressed, here's my spiel. So basically Scott and I had planned sometime last week that we'd hang out on Sunday, and he had to bump it to today due to "family plans". Well, as far as I know, he blew me off yet again with the excuse that he hadn't asked his parents yet and they were out so he couldn't ask now (even though his parents wouldn't have given a shit), and most likely just sat around playing video games and ignoring me when I tried to talk to him after he gave me his excuse.
That's not the only thing though...for a while I've just been feeling like my friends are slowly drifting away. Three already over the past little while have just kinda dropped outside of the radar and I never talk to them online and thus never see them in the flesh. Other friends I'm starting to talk to less and less too, and my online life seems to be getting gradually more awesome but also seems to impede any progress made with "real-life" friends. And since some of my closest friends are never able to hang out with me and I don't really feel a strong bond with anyone, it's all starting to pile-up and affect me greatly. Doesn't help that I've been sick the last couple of days, been busy doing "slave labor" as my Mom calls it (my flyer route), and every other day I have to tidy and vacate my own home so some person(s) can march in and judge the way my family lives. Last night was the one time I was actually able to get a good sleep over the past few days, and even that was cut short because of the 9:45-10:45 showing in the morning.
I think I'll be alright come tomorrow morning. I sure hope so...I don't wanna be in one of my "moods" to hang out with Hayden. I'll probably have more positive input for Twitter and the blog almost as soon as I wake up. Or at least more usual input. :P Still kinda psyched to start vlogging, which I think I'll do Wednesday just before I leave for camping Thursday through Monday. No idea what I'll use to put it together...
And that's about that. I feel a bit calmer and happier already now that I've vented a bit, but I still don't want anything more to do with people tonight. The best idea now is to grab a warm diet coke, a book, my wolf, and my iPod for a good couple hours of reading before bed. Getting immersed in a new world really helps to take away the pain and stress from this world. So unless you really wanna text me because you have something extremely important or just want to be a prick and spam me with one-word texts to which I will reply with rather inappropriate language, I'll be ignoring the internet until morning.
Until then...g'night! :3
8.22.2011
Twitter, Vlogging, and the usual.
Sorry for not blogging yesternight. Was extremely sick in the morning and then spent the entire night talking to people. In case you don't already know, I'm now in a relationship. :3 But I'll spare you the details for now.
So today I got up at 9:15am...and had 30 minutes to get the house ready for a 9:45-10:45 showing of the house. It was just a matter of cleaning up my bedroom...and not eating or showering...I had about enough time to make myself a cup of tea and grab the dog after I finished tidying the place. :/ And ever since I've been listening to music and talking to like 4 people while Twittering, eating raw spaghetti, and eyeing poptarts that I can;t seem to stomach. Currently attempting to start up Minecraft...it's being really slow. x.x
Regarding the original purpose for this blog post (and henceforth the appropriate title name) I'm thinking about adding a Twitter application to the side of the blog, for those who are too lazy to go on Twitter but are still interested in seeing some of the crap I say on there every so often. Also I might start vlogging once a week or once every couple weeks. Would anyone care for either of those? And if I am going to blog, should I just use my phone or webcam, or should I go to the trouble of pulling out my Cybershot and messing around with that? It'll have much better quality (12.1MP versus 1.3MP...you don't even need to understand technology to realize how big of a gap that is) but I'm not going to be doing it too often and not many people will be seeing it anyways, so unless you really want to see my face (you creeps) then I'm not gonna bother with setting the thing up.
Yeah...I think I'll do a blog montage sometime this week before I head off camping from Thrusday 'til Monday. I'll use all three cameras to see which one is more convenient and which one has better quality for what I'm doing. I dunno if I'll post them on YouTube yet; I might just post them there and feature them in the blogs rather than making them blog-exclusive. I haven't really done anything with my YouTube account anyways, so may as well dust it off and throw any vlogs I do up there. :P
Welp, I think my brother actually decided to make breakfast. I should go check on him and possibly eat some. Later!
So today I got up at 9:15am...and had 30 minutes to get the house ready for a 9:45-10:45 showing of the house. It was just a matter of cleaning up my bedroom...and not eating or showering...I had about enough time to make myself a cup of tea and grab the dog after I finished tidying the place. :/ And ever since I've been listening to music and talking to like 4 people while Twittering, eating raw spaghetti, and eyeing poptarts that I can;t seem to stomach. Currently attempting to start up Minecraft...it's being really slow. x.x
Regarding the original purpose for this blog post (and henceforth the appropriate title name) I'm thinking about adding a Twitter application to the side of the blog, for those who are too lazy to go on Twitter but are still interested in seeing some of the crap I say on there every so often. Also I might start vlogging once a week or once every couple weeks. Would anyone care for either of those? And if I am going to blog, should I just use my phone or webcam, or should I go to the trouble of pulling out my Cybershot and messing around with that? It'll have much better quality (12.1MP versus 1.3MP...you don't even need to understand technology to realize how big of a gap that is) but I'm not going to be doing it too often and not many people will be seeing it anyways, so unless you really want to see my face (you creeps) then I'm not gonna bother with setting the thing up.
Yeah...I think I'll do a blog montage sometime this week before I head off camping from Thrusday 'til Monday. I'll use all three cameras to see which one is more convenient and which one has better quality for what I'm doing. I dunno if I'll post them on YouTube yet; I might just post them there and feature them in the blogs rather than making them blog-exclusive. I haven't really done anything with my YouTube account anyways, so may as well dust it off and throw any vlogs I do up there. :P
Welp, I think my brother actually decided to make breakfast. I should go check on him and possibly eat some. Later!
8.20.2011
DAMMIT DEVAN
YOU THINK YOUR MOFUCKIN FLYERS ARE BAD
But serious, I got a 252 stack of Ikea catlogues on Monday morning, so I had to deliver those to every single house before I even started my flyers, then on Thursday I had to put together about 250 flyers and THEN go deliver those, and to top it off, I also had to deliver Sears 'Christmas Wish Books" Raaaaaage
A TON OF STUFF AND (maybe) EMOTIONS
So, I got the flyer routes done yesterday. It was a bitch to do, but my brother and my Mom helped, so it was done a lot quicker than I expected it to take me alone. We also went to DQ for orange juliuses afterwards which was a tasty treat.
Spent the rest of that night watching Futurama...and once again wiping out my laptop and starting fresh with a new OS. Well, not exactly "new". I'm now running Ubuntu Linux 10.10 (Maverick Meerkat). To those of you who know nothing about computers, I basically removed everything that made my computer work before and replaced it with something faster and nicer looking but a lot less practical. And I love it so much. Steam, Raptr, and iTunes (to an extent) work inside Ubuntu, and supposedly Microsoft Office 2010 works in it too, but it needs the actual disk to install it, which I don't have.
Today I basically spent my day doing nothing. Set up my computer more, cooked and ate some Pillsbury biscuits, ate half a bag of raw spaghetti, got a really bad headache that two tablets of Tylenol cured instantly, and played Grand Theft Auto IV all evening. Tried some Sobe smoothie drink or something that tasted amazing. But yeah, nothing else really happened.
Tonight I plan on gettin' comfortable and watching some Futurama while eating Pizza Pops. So interesting, right? Well, I wish it was a little more interesting. I think I might get more in-tune with the internet communities at some point...introversion sucks large hairy horse dicks.
...Drama. It is ripping me apart. So many people are dealing with issues with other people, issues with me, issues with other people I know...the list goes on. It's quite frankly the most annoying thing ever. Why can't people just talk out their problems rather than bitching to someone else about them or covering the problems up and acting weird while pretending everyone else knows what's wrong and should be apologizing. But whatever. That was directed at a bunch of people who I am certain don't read my blog anyway *coughsam'sfriendscough* *coughnataliecough*
REMEMBER PEOPLE. I like honesty and I like it when people are open with me. You can pour your heart out to me and I can give you advice, but CONTINUOSLY BUGGING ME ABOUT IT WILL NOT PROVE GOOD FOR MY MOOD OR YOURS. Unless I prompt you for more information, it's best you keep your problems vague rather than going into detail about something I couldn't give less of a shit about.
THAT SAID. There are people that don't talk enough and are always trying to hear about me. Expecting me to talk is a BAD IDEA. One-sided conversations will usually drop my interest pretty quickly. I struggle as-is trying to keep up conversations where both people are talking. It's even worse when one person starts a conversation and sits there expecting me to say interesting things or rant or blah blah blah, and every five minutes they'll post "lala" or whatever to signify that the conversation is going nowhere and I apparently need to do something about it, when in fact it is BOTH of our responsibility as we're BOTH part of the conversation and BOTH of us are not talking.
Kinda got off on a rant there. Notice I'm not angry, just...a little fed up with all this. Tired, if you will. Right now I'm actually in a good(ish) mood in person (if a bit lonely), but naturally my inner, unspoken voice that only really makes it out onto the internet is very depressed and angry and sad and all those negative things that people don't like to see or feel. So I'm not yelling, just...thought-dumping, I guess. Like taking a load off my back emotionally.
That's all for tonight, I guess...
Spent the rest of that night watching Futurama...and once again wiping out my laptop and starting fresh with a new OS. Well, not exactly "new". I'm now running Ubuntu Linux 10.10 (Maverick Meerkat). To those of you who know nothing about computers, I basically removed everything that made my computer work before and replaced it with something faster and nicer looking but a lot less practical. And I love it so much. Steam, Raptr, and iTunes (to an extent) work inside Ubuntu, and supposedly Microsoft Office 2010 works in it too, but it needs the actual disk to install it, which I don't have.
Today I basically spent my day doing nothing. Set up my computer more, cooked and ate some Pillsbury biscuits, ate half a bag of raw spaghetti, got a really bad headache that two tablets of Tylenol cured instantly, and played Grand Theft Auto IV all evening. Tried some Sobe smoothie drink or something that tasted amazing. But yeah, nothing else really happened.
Tonight I plan on gettin' comfortable and watching some Futurama while eating Pizza Pops. So interesting, right? Well, I wish it was a little more interesting. I think I might get more in-tune with the internet communities at some point...introversion sucks large hairy horse dicks.
...Drama. It is ripping me apart. So many people are dealing with issues with other people, issues with me, issues with other people I know...the list goes on. It's quite frankly the most annoying thing ever. Why can't people just talk out their problems rather than bitching to someone else about them or covering the problems up and acting weird while pretending everyone else knows what's wrong and should be apologizing. But whatever. That was directed at a bunch of people who I am certain don't read my blog anyway *coughsam'sfriendscough* *coughnataliecough*
REMEMBER PEOPLE. I like honesty and I like it when people are open with me. You can pour your heart out to me and I can give you advice, but CONTINUOSLY BUGGING ME ABOUT IT WILL NOT PROVE GOOD FOR MY MOOD OR YOURS. Unless I prompt you for more information, it's best you keep your problems vague rather than going into detail about something I couldn't give less of a shit about.
THAT SAID. There are people that don't talk enough and are always trying to hear about me. Expecting me to talk is a BAD IDEA. One-sided conversations will usually drop my interest pretty quickly. I struggle as-is trying to keep up conversations where both people are talking. It's even worse when one person starts a conversation and sits there expecting me to say interesting things or rant or blah blah blah, and every five minutes they'll post "lala" or whatever to signify that the conversation is going nowhere and I apparently need to do something about it, when in fact it is BOTH of our responsibility as we're BOTH part of the conversation and BOTH of us are not talking.
Kinda got off on a rant there. Notice I'm not angry, just...a little fed up with all this. Tired, if you will. Right now I'm actually in a good(ish) mood in person (if a bit lonely), but naturally my inner, unspoken voice that only really makes it out onto the internet is very depressed and angry and sad and all those negative things that people don't like to see or feel. So I'm not yelling, just...thought-dumping, I guess. Like taking a load off my back emotionally.
That's all for tonight, I guess...
8.18.2011
FLYERS.
So apparently I'm not camping with my Dad until NEXT weekend. Thought I'd clear that up with you guys first.
Two routes down, one to go. And then I have to deliver them all! All I'm gonna get for a paycheck for this as well as the last two weeks is about $60. That's disgusting. I need a better job...
I have to do a route of 76 houses every week. That means stacking up about 8 flyers and shoving them into a plastic bag 76 times and then delivering them, all within a two-day stretch. But this week I got dumped with an extra two routes, one for 86 houses and the other 100 houses. I've been working for 7 hours today and only managed to get my route and the 100-house route packed and ready to be delivered, leaving the 86 house lot for tomorrow, which I will have to manage around delivering all the routes and having a house showing between 4pm and 5pm.
But yeah...I'm totally dead right now and in one of those moods again sorta. I came up with so many ideas to write a story about and had my iTunes on shuffle at full volume the entire time. Was brutal as fuck. And now I'm lonely as fuck, aside from maybe talking to Sam, though it'd be much easier if she actually used Google Talk rather than just Gmailing me.
Welp, I've really got nothing else to say. I'm gonna sit here for a while cuddling my wolfie, listening to music, and reading a book I finally managed to get my hands on. Then soon I'll go to bed...
Two routes down, one to go. And then I have to deliver them all! All I'm gonna get for a paycheck for this as well as the last two weeks is about $60. That's disgusting. I need a better job...
I have to do a route of 76 houses every week. That means stacking up about 8 flyers and shoving them into a plastic bag 76 times and then delivering them, all within a two-day stretch. But this week I got dumped with an extra two routes, one for 86 houses and the other 100 houses. I've been working for 7 hours today and only managed to get my route and the 100-house route packed and ready to be delivered, leaving the 86 house lot for tomorrow, which I will have to manage around delivering all the routes and having a house showing between 4pm and 5pm.
But yeah...I'm totally dead right now and in one of those moods again sorta. I came up with so many ideas to write a story about and had my iTunes on shuffle at full volume the entire time. Was brutal as fuck. And now I'm lonely as fuck, aside from maybe talking to Sam, though it'd be much easier if she actually used Google Talk rather than just Gmailing me.
Welp, I've really got nothing else to say. I'm gonna sit here for a while cuddling my wolfie, listening to music, and reading a book I finally managed to get my hands on. Then soon I'll go to bed...
8.17.2011
Flyers Flyers Flyers
I just woke up about 45 minutes ago. I have yet to eat something. Three routes worth of flyers are sitting in my garage and I have to get them all put together today so I can deliver them today. With tomorrow's delivery and the weekend camping trip on the weekend, I will barely have any time to hang out with anyone - internet-wise or by other means - until Tuesday. Isn't that just fucking peachy?
I have to do my normal route of 76, plus two additional routes of what I think are 86. So that means about 5 hours of putting them together and about an hour per route delivering them. Fun.
I've had a can of Coca-Cola but no breakfast/lunch, as usual, so now I need to go grab a shower or something, scarf down a couple poptarts, and get to work.
Oh, and my PSP Go bricked last night. Even the power light refuses to turn on. So there goes a large sum of money I was planning to put into something new.
So anyway, time to go do the most boring thing in the world...
I have to do my normal route of 76, plus two additional routes of what I think are 86. So that means about 5 hours of putting them together and about an hour per route delivering them. Fun.
I've had a can of Coca-Cola but no breakfast/lunch, as usual, so now I need to go grab a shower or something, scarf down a couple poptarts, and get to work.
Oh, and my PSP Go bricked last night. Even the power light refuses to turn on. So there goes a large sum of money I was planning to put into something new.
So anyway, time to go do the most boring thing in the world...
8.16.2011
I just have to say this because I doubt my friend will ever read my blog anyways.
If Scott had a crush on me, I don't know whether I'd laugh hysterically or just tease him about it and call it adorable. But I'd never take him seriously about it, not even for a second. With the way he acts, the way he ignores me and the way he never tries to arrange any days to hang out and leaves it all up to me...I may as well hate his guts. And I'm not the only one he does this to. Unless he shaped up pretty quickly, I wouldn't even consider CUDDLING with him. And I'd cuddle with anyone, so that's pretty serious.
Yeah, I'm sure he doesn't read my blog, so he probably won't ever see this thing. :P
It's... 11:25 PM
And this blog I just typed had an error so it turns out I'm not writing a blog today.
...and became utterly fucking awesome.
So, in the last blog post I ranted about the house showing and mentioned some previously conceived plans. WELL. At around 3:30am, Hayden and I decided to hang out just the two of us to change it up for a change, since I always see him when Scott's around and they both act like douches together. This morning, I texted him exactly at 11am (I said I'd text him between 11 and 12) and he didn't get back to me until 12 because he slept in. We worked out the details and, just after I had gotten back in the house after the showing and settled fown a bit, he showed up.
And it was a blast. First he came down to the basement and we figured out that Killzone 2 has no local multiplayer. So then we just sat there...talking about random shit. Weird, right? It's extremely rarely you can see two nerds having fun just talking. Then we pulled out our laptops and went on to talk about technology and shit and share the music we like. Things were going pretty well, but then my stomach growled and we decided we should eat something (it was 2:00pm by this point). Since he's used to city life and eating out, as well as the fact that there isn't much to snack on in the house, I threw him a can of Coca-Cola and grabbed one for myself, then we both headed out to Domenic's pizza. We talked a ton and listened to music on the way there. Though the place was closed for the next hour, so we walked up to Shopper's Drug Mart instead and he picked me up Fallout New Vegas brand new for PS3 for only $20 (which I need to remember to pay him back for) and then headed down to the corner store and piled up our cash for a couple chocolate bars and a bag of Skittles. Talked all the way back, then went home and played some Fallout for a bit to try it out before going back outside and again talking up a storm and fooling around at the park across the road.
Dinner was alright too. At first Hayden seemed uncomfortable, but soon we got to gossiping with my Mom about the various friends I've brought over to my house. Went back downstairs to talk some more and play Rock Band (which I am apparently good at or something?) and sealed off the evening lounging around talking about video game consoles. He had to leave at 8:30 and now I'm lonely, of course. :P
So despite all the shit that happened earlier today, the day ended off well and I feel pretty content right now. Though I don't have anyone to talk to...I already miss my online chat buddy. >.< Oh well.
And it was a blast. First he came down to the basement and we figured out that Killzone 2 has no local multiplayer. So then we just sat there...talking about random shit. Weird, right? It's extremely rarely you can see two nerds having fun just talking. Then we pulled out our laptops and went on to talk about technology and shit and share the music we like. Things were going pretty well, but then my stomach growled and we decided we should eat something (it was 2:00pm by this point). Since he's used to city life and eating out, as well as the fact that there isn't much to snack on in the house, I threw him a can of Coca-Cola and grabbed one for myself, then we both headed out to Domenic's pizza. We talked a ton and listened to music on the way there. Though the place was closed for the next hour, so we walked up to Shopper's Drug Mart instead and he picked me up Fallout New Vegas brand new for PS3 for only $20 (which I need to remember to pay him back for) and then headed down to the corner store and piled up our cash for a couple chocolate bars and a bag of Skittles. Talked all the way back, then went home and played some Fallout for a bit to try it out before going back outside and again talking up a storm and fooling around at the park across the road.
Dinner was alright too. At first Hayden seemed uncomfortable, but soon we got to gossiping with my Mom about the various friends I've brought over to my house. Went back downstairs to talk some more and play Rock Band (which I am apparently good at or something?) and sealed off the evening lounging around talking about video game consoles. He had to leave at 8:30 and now I'm lonely, of course. :P
So despite all the shit that happened earlier today, the day ended off well and I feel pretty content right now. Though I don't have anyone to talk to...I already miss my online chat buddy. >.< Oh well.
Today went from shit...
This is the first part of the day; the second (good) parts will follow in a separate post.
So I woke up in a bad position (figuratively, not literally) around 9:40am. I put on a random alarm labeled "friends" the night before and it ended up waking me at 9am, so I decided to go back to bed for a little while, just to rest and think. My brother knocked and got me out of a daydream and when he came in he handed me the dreaded phone. I answered the call and my Mom told me there was a showing of our house between 12 and 1pm, and that I needed to have the house clean and ready by then. I had already made plans for the day, so that fucked everything up.
After throwing all my clothes in the washer and picking out of the small bit of clothes remaining in my dresser, I grabbed a quick shower and jumped onto my laptop. Made myself a large mug of tea and also had a coke, but never even took a nibble of the poptarts I had open in front of me. Caught up on my Twitter and when I had finally finished the two beverages (in a matter of maybe 5 to 10 minutes) I went upstairs and threw my sheets in the washer as well, as they were due for a cleaning. I had a good chunk of time left by that point, so I didn't think it'd matter.
By this time my puppy had already been out and about and I was frantically trying to make everything spotless and organized. So of course the puppy does no other than piss on the carpet for me. Then after telling her off, she sprints up and hides under the bed in my Mom's room, thinking everything is a game and dashing out of whatever side I wasn't on only to go back in under the bed. I was infuriated with the mutt and stressed with all the pressure of trying to organize the house on my own and finally yanked the dog out from under the bed by her paw and threw her into her crate downstairs. I wasn't too happy by that point. Then, as if things couldn't get any worse, the dryer and washer loads were taking way too long to do their cycles. The loads did partially finish in time, at least what I needed to make the house look normal, but it was annoying nonetheless. The house was cleaned and ready just in time, so without shaving like I needed to, my brother and the dog and I all went over to the park for an hour or so.
While my brother walked the dog around boredly, I was sitting under the playground equipment attempting to see Minecraft Pocket Edition on my phone. And not only did the person show up at 12:49, but they only stayed for ten minutes before heading back out again. I was pretty furious that I had put all that work into the house just for someone to come in and take a quick peek at the latest time they could possibly manage. DURING LUNCH HOUR. Not the greatest start to the day. Surely things would improve later...
So I woke up in a bad position (figuratively, not literally) around 9:40am. I put on a random alarm labeled "friends" the night before and it ended up waking me at 9am, so I decided to go back to bed for a little while, just to rest and think. My brother knocked and got me out of a daydream and when he came in he handed me the dreaded phone. I answered the call and my Mom told me there was a showing of our house between 12 and 1pm, and that I needed to have the house clean and ready by then. I had already made plans for the day, so that fucked everything up.
After throwing all my clothes in the washer and picking out of the small bit of clothes remaining in my dresser, I grabbed a quick shower and jumped onto my laptop. Made myself a large mug of tea and also had a coke, but never even took a nibble of the poptarts I had open in front of me. Caught up on my Twitter and when I had finally finished the two beverages (in a matter of maybe 5 to 10 minutes) I went upstairs and threw my sheets in the washer as well, as they were due for a cleaning. I had a good chunk of time left by that point, so I didn't think it'd matter.
By this time my puppy had already been out and about and I was frantically trying to make everything spotless and organized. So of course the puppy does no other than piss on the carpet for me. Then after telling her off, she sprints up and hides under the bed in my Mom's room, thinking everything is a game and dashing out of whatever side I wasn't on only to go back in under the bed. I was infuriated with the mutt and stressed with all the pressure of trying to organize the house on my own and finally yanked the dog out from under the bed by her paw and threw her into her crate downstairs. I wasn't too happy by that point. Then, as if things couldn't get any worse, the dryer and washer loads were taking way too long to do their cycles. The loads did partially finish in time, at least what I needed to make the house look normal, but it was annoying nonetheless. The house was cleaned and ready just in time, so without shaving like I needed to, my brother and the dog and I all went over to the park for an hour or so.
While my brother walked the dog around boredly, I was sitting under the playground equipment attempting to see Minecraft Pocket Edition on my phone. And not only did the person show up at 12:49, but they only stayed for ten minutes before heading back out again. I was pretty furious that I had put all that work into the house just for someone to come in and take a quick peek at the latest time they could possibly manage. DURING LUNCH HOUR. Not the greatest start to the day. Surely things would improve later...
8.15.2011
Ugh, weekdays are SO unexciting.
Just sitting here with nothing to do now. I went to the library and managed to pay off a fine of $1.25 and I thought it'd be a lot more expensive so that went well. Didn't even need my ID or anything to get my card renewed since I'm 15 and last used my card when I was 13, before I was considered an "adult" to them. Even found a book I wanted to read, and since I'm on the fourth in the series and all they had was that and the 20-somethingth book, that was pretty impressive. Also went to the post office and didn't need ID there to pick up an uninteresting envelope that they weren't allowed to bend to fit in the post box.
Got home and have been chilling here in the basement since, aside from a boring dinner of salmon skewers and white rice. I've been playing a bit of the campaign in Killzone 2 on the hardest unlocked difficulty, Veteran. It's pretty easy once you get the hang of things, and I've been making steady progress through the first level. Well, I was until my controller died and I decided to go on my laptop instead. Right now I'm blasting my iTunes on shuffle despite my small headache. I love disregarding headaches.
Welp, just nuked some popcorn and I'm off to get that. Maybe I'll force Nick to write a blog post later or something, if I'm bored enough to talk to him.
Got home and have been chilling here in the basement since, aside from a boring dinner of salmon skewers and white rice. I've been playing a bit of the campaign in Killzone 2 on the hardest unlocked difficulty, Veteran. It's pretty easy once you get the hang of things, and I've been making steady progress through the first level. Well, I was until my controller died and I decided to go on my laptop instead. Right now I'm blasting my iTunes on shuffle despite my small headache. I love disregarding headaches.
Welp, just nuked some popcorn and I'm off to get that. Maybe I'll force Nick to write a blog post later or something, if I'm bored enough to talk to him.
Had a dream about "this man"
So the man I spoke of in my last blog might very well have appeared in my dream. I fell back to sleep shortly after blogging and the dream I had was very vague, short, and, well...dreamlike. It lacked a lot of those realistic qualities I usually have in my dreams but that may have something to do with me being already well rested and having dreamed like three times already last night.
In the dream, there was someone dangerous in my basement. My family was gathered around in the living room and the only thing I thought I could do was protect myself. When he came up the stairs, I grabbed a handful of knives from the drawers in the kitchen (our house is extremely small, so the kitchen is pretty much a part of the living room and vice-versa). I threw the knives at the man and one even hit him in a good spot and went in deep, but he still stood there smiling creepily. Then I awoke.
See, this is what I'm talking about. It's super simple to inject a face into your dreams if you want to. Simply seeing the photo caused my own brain to focus on making a dream involving the face and a scenario in which it would be the main focus. So it'd be just as easy for someone to convince themselves they saw him in their dreams when really it was just another generic and faceless dream person.
In the dream, there was someone dangerous in my basement. My family was gathered around in the living room and the only thing I thought I could do was protect myself. When he came up the stairs, I grabbed a handful of knives from the drawers in the kitchen (our house is extremely small, so the kitchen is pretty much a part of the living room and vice-versa). I threw the knives at the man and one even hit him in a good spot and went in deep, but he still stood there smiling creepily. Then I awoke.
See, this is what I'm talking about. It's super simple to inject a face into your dreams if you want to. Simply seeing the photo caused my own brain to focus on making a dream involving the face and a scenario in which it would be the main focus. So it'd be just as easy for someone to convince themselves they saw him in their dreams when really it was just another generic and faceless dream person.
Dreaming.
The way I dream is odd. It's much like lucid dreaming, only I've left it up to my subconscious what exactly will show up in the dream. Whatever I'm in the mood for usually pops up, however the thought behind it all is very abstract from what I myself might think up as a scenario in my consciousness. And the details in my dreams are far greater than that I've heard from other people's dreams. I think it has something to do with a greater mind capacity, possibly the reason why I find it so hard to concentrate on one thing at a time as I am always trying to think many things at once and end up losing track of what I was originally thinking. When I'm in a dream it feels so close to reality, even though I know that it's a dream. I have full control of my actions within the dream and if I don't like how it's turning out I am easily able to find a way out.
Despite my odd dreaming habits, I have never seen this man in my dreams, or at least I don't remember ever seeing him, though there's an odd feeling of spooky déjà vu. Upon seeing the picture I wasn't so much revolted as I was absolutely fucking terrified of the image. Although I have felt faint bad vibes come off of certain people in the past, I have never had such a sure and strong bad vibe come out of anything as big as the one this image portrayed to me.
Now, even though there's a possibility that people could be seeing the same man in their dreams, I think it has more to do with how revolting the picture is. The eerie feeling that one gets when seeing such a thing can often confuse people, and when offered something as vague as their dreams to blame the déjà vu factor on, they are quick to place him somewhere and burn the image in their head. It is possible for someone to replace things in their dreams and memories so that they confuse them with real memories or hide things from themselves which are too traumatic to handle. A spook factor given by this image would be a simple enough trauma to allow those who see it to simply modify their cached dreams with the image. Since people apparently don't remember or see proper faces in dreams (I don't know if this is true since my mind seems to be capable of designing faces and even full projections of false people from scratch) it would be very easy for them to plant the image where they couldn't fully remember a face and say it was him.
The thing is, the theory that he could be someone in reality hijacking dreams could very well connect to me being able to think up my own dreams. Since I have control over my dreaming, this could be the reason why he has never showed up. Other "weaker" dreamers who seem to not have the ability of control that I have may have really wide openings for people to get into their heads and mess around with their dreams. Though when I read through all the supposed dreams containing the man, a couple displayed possible similarities to my own dreams, especially the one involving the slit throat. I've had a dream where somebody finished me off by slitting my throat because I was in fear of something worse happening (and since my dreams are very realistic, pain is something that is emulated way too well within them). I don't even remember who it was, and it most likely wasn't the man in question, but it's definitely got some relations.
Well, for the moment I'm going to say that it's gotta all be a big hoax. Like I said, somehow this image must be manipulating people into thinking that they've seen him before, and somehow the image was made up by some team of psychologists that know how to get into one's mind. It's the only explanation that makes any sense to me, really. The theories on the site all contain some level of religious/supernatural/magical mumbo-jumbo, so there's really no realistic explanation as to how a few thousand people have spied this weirdo while in dreamland. So it may as well be a hoax.
Despite my odd dreaming habits, I have never seen this man in my dreams, or at least I don't remember ever seeing him, though there's an odd feeling of spooky déjà vu. Upon seeing the picture I wasn't so much revolted as I was absolutely fucking terrified of the image. Although I have felt faint bad vibes come off of certain people in the past, I have never had such a sure and strong bad vibe come out of anything as big as the one this image portrayed to me.
Now, even though there's a possibility that people could be seeing the same man in their dreams, I think it has more to do with how revolting the picture is. The eerie feeling that one gets when seeing such a thing can often confuse people, and when offered something as vague as their dreams to blame the déjà vu factor on, they are quick to place him somewhere and burn the image in their head. It is possible for someone to replace things in their dreams and memories so that they confuse them with real memories or hide things from themselves which are too traumatic to handle. A spook factor given by this image would be a simple enough trauma to allow those who see it to simply modify their cached dreams with the image. Since people apparently don't remember or see proper faces in dreams (I don't know if this is true since my mind seems to be capable of designing faces and even full projections of false people from scratch) it would be very easy for them to plant the image where they couldn't fully remember a face and say it was him.
The thing is, the theory that he could be someone in reality hijacking dreams could very well connect to me being able to think up my own dreams. Since I have control over my dreaming, this could be the reason why he has never showed up. Other "weaker" dreamers who seem to not have the ability of control that I have may have really wide openings for people to get into their heads and mess around with their dreams. Though when I read through all the supposed dreams containing the man, a couple displayed possible similarities to my own dreams, especially the one involving the slit throat. I've had a dream where somebody finished me off by slitting my throat because I was in fear of something worse happening (and since my dreams are very realistic, pain is something that is emulated way too well within them). I don't even remember who it was, and it most likely wasn't the man in question, but it's definitely got some relations.
Well, for the moment I'm going to say that it's gotta all be a big hoax. Like I said, somehow this image must be manipulating people into thinking that they've seen him before, and somehow the image was made up by some team of psychologists that know how to get into one's mind. It's the only explanation that makes any sense to me, really. The theories on the site all contain some level of religious/supernatural/magical mumbo-jumbo, so there's really no realistic explanation as to how a few thousand people have spied this weirdo while in dreamland. So it may as well be a hoax.
Sleep, or lack thereof.
The other day I decided to stay up all night talking. So worth it, except when you're trying to play new games on PS3 and end up falling asleep twice due to ridiculously long game updates as well as a system update. Killzone 2 I have to say was the most confusing game in the history of ever, considering I started playing matchmaking only to be chucked into an extremely long match consisting of like 10 different gametypes throughout the duration. And the controls are all shit though there was at least one that I can tolerate. Seriously, don't put grenades and firearms on the same side of shoulder buttons. Does not want. I'm fairly good at it, but I just...have no fucking clue what's going on half the time. It's madness.
On the other hand there's GTA IV which I'm pretty disappointed with. Looks like they spent more time optimizing it for use on the Xbox 360 rather than the PS3 because some of the cutscenes are glitchy and the controls feel off. Not just the way the controller feels which can't be helped, but there's almost a slight delay I feel in the controls. Casuals wouldn't even notice, but I certainly do. You'd think a game that was such a big staple for gamers not too long ago would have had all the bugs worked out by now.
Aside from finally playing those games I spent most of the day sleeping. Went to lay on my bed for a couple minutes waiting for my Mom's friend to clear out and ended up curling up with the cat and before I knew what was happened I had fallen asleep for like a half hour. My Mom came in when I woke up and I asked her about dinner, at which point she offered to make me something and I asked for a burger and rice. I fell back asleep and woke up again when she woke me and told me my food was on the counter, but I fell asleep again and she ate it on me.
Later on I woke up and went downstairs, ate a ton of caramels, ate a breakfast sammich, and of course went straight back upstairs and fell asleep. Kept waking up in the night, so I decided to just stop trying around 5:40am. Now I'm sitting here waiting for my Mom to get up for work so I can grab some ID offa her and possibly make the trip to the library to get my new "adult" library card. The one I was supposed to get when I turned 14 or something. Yeah, I read a lot, can you tell? :P I actually used to read a lot, but there's a small fine on my old card and I need ID to get my new card, so since my Mom likes to hold onto my ID, I haven't had a chance to get a new card, even with the library in biking distance.
So yeah, other than a few books but more likely a bit of gaming, that's all I have planned for today and the rest of the week. Exciting stuff, huh? What's the point in having a summer break if all you're going to do is sit around and play video games because work prevents your parent from taking you anywhere and weekends are booked solid with family plans? Fuck is this ever annoying.
On the other hand there's GTA IV which I'm pretty disappointed with. Looks like they spent more time optimizing it for use on the Xbox 360 rather than the PS3 because some of the cutscenes are glitchy and the controls feel off. Not just the way the controller feels which can't be helped, but there's almost a slight delay I feel in the controls. Casuals wouldn't even notice, but I certainly do. You'd think a game that was such a big staple for gamers not too long ago would have had all the bugs worked out by now.
Aside from finally playing those games I spent most of the day sleeping. Went to lay on my bed for a couple minutes waiting for my Mom's friend to clear out and ended up curling up with the cat and before I knew what was happened I had fallen asleep for like a half hour. My Mom came in when I woke up and I asked her about dinner, at which point she offered to make me something and I asked for a burger and rice. I fell back asleep and woke up again when she woke me and told me my food was on the counter, but I fell asleep again and she ate it on me.
Later on I woke up and went downstairs, ate a ton of caramels, ate a breakfast sammich, and of course went straight back upstairs and fell asleep. Kept waking up in the night, so I decided to just stop trying around 5:40am. Now I'm sitting here waiting for my Mom to get up for work so I can grab some ID offa her and possibly make the trip to the library to get my new "adult" library card. The one I was supposed to get when I turned 14 or something. Yeah, I read a lot, can you tell? :P I actually used to read a lot, but there's a small fine on my old card and I need ID to get my new card, so since my Mom likes to hold onto my ID, I haven't had a chance to get a new card, even with the library in biking distance.
So yeah, other than a few books but more likely a bit of gaming, that's all I have planned for today and the rest of the week. Exciting stuff, huh? What's the point in having a summer break if all you're going to do is sit around and play video games because work prevents your parent from taking you anywhere and weekends are booked solid with family plans? Fuck is this ever annoying.
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